I have no words to express today. It was good.
The movers arrived on time (well, on time considering they were one day late) and they did fantastic work. They were pleasant men, and I enjoyed chatting with their manager. Because they did such good work, I was able to sit on the couch and read a book for nearly 5 hours, eventually struggling to stay awake. I kept thinking, what would they think if I just curled up and took a nap here on the couch?
I enjoyed a too brief conversation with my friend Julie.
I got to meet Wendy's daughter, and to see our old driver and meet his family.
I watched every unwanted item from my house go to someone who felt truly excited to take it.
I welcomed the Bible Study ladies into my home one more time, and watched my friends feel at home with each other and in this space.
I enjoyed a truly fantastic burger in wonderful company.
I delivered a box of maternity clothes to Larissa, and enjoyed a late night conversation with her while waiting for her husband to arrive from Mongolia.
I talked to Dave about the weekend, and am now looking forward to sleeping in my bed, on sheets and pillows which I picked out, for the last time in a long time. I have nowhere to be until 10:45 tomorrow morning, and so am looking forward to a late start, a hot shower, and a walk through the hidden lanes of this my neighborhood to the amazing little bakery a few blocks away.
An idyllic way to end my solitary weekend, before rushing home and arriving just in time for family dinner before Dave jumps out the door for an overnight flight to Singapore. He will spend this week out of town, much like last week, and much like the week after this. I'm exhausted, and really looking forward to my hot shower and the walk to the bakery tomorrow morning.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Low Key Saturday
Dave and the girls spent the day at home, in Shenzhen.
I spent the day at home, in Shanghai.
Dave gave the girls exactly the weekend they needed right now, relaxing and familiar. They spent the entire day at home, going to the pool (where they inadvertently made friends with the neighbor kids - yay!), playing at home, and only leaving the grounds to eat lunch at McDonald's.
I enjoyed what turned out to be a lovely Saturday alone. We scheduled the movers to arrive at 10am this morning, and so I sat on the couch at 9:50 to await their arrival. The house was sorted, organized, taped and stacked. There was nothing left for me to do but read. So I read until 11:00, when I began to wonder if anyone would be coming to pack the house at all.
As it turns out, no one planned to come. They would arrive tomorrow morning at 9:30, I was later informed. This turned out to be a fantastic blessing, as I could run all of those last-minute errands which fell by the wayside in such a quick move. I hit the diaper street, where packs of Huggies Gold run about half the price of Wal-Mart or Carrefour. I hit the apartment cum bookstore, where overstocked and slightly mishandled English children's books sell for a maximum of $5 per book. I hit the movie store, where they stock every title you can come up with and sell each for less than $2 per disc. I hit the boutique which takes inspiration from French and Chinese fashion, creating lovely pieces for little girls at truly lovely prices. I hit one of my favorite restaurants for lunch, and another for dinner. I arrived home with a very full backpack, a very full stomach, and a quiet house in which to watch a brand new movie.
This may not sound like a relaxing day, but it was. There was no racing through the amazing heat to meet a particular deadline. There were no children crying, arguing, or pulling on my skirt. There was no cleaning up after one but myself.
And at the end of the day, I still get to sleep in my own bed. I am melancholy to realize how much I enjoy this house and this neighborhood. They would not have been the right fit for our family this year, and so I am relieved to be in a new place. But they are comfortable, charming, and definitely home. I am sad to leave.
I spent the day at home, in Shanghai.
Dave gave the girls exactly the weekend they needed right now, relaxing and familiar. They spent the entire day at home, going to the pool (where they inadvertently made friends with the neighbor kids - yay!), playing at home, and only leaving the grounds to eat lunch at McDonald's.
I enjoyed what turned out to be a lovely Saturday alone. We scheduled the movers to arrive at 10am this morning, and so I sat on the couch at 9:50 to await their arrival. The house was sorted, organized, taped and stacked. There was nothing left for me to do but read. So I read until 11:00, when I began to wonder if anyone would be coming to pack the house at all.
As it turns out, no one planned to come. They would arrive tomorrow morning at 9:30, I was later informed. This turned out to be a fantastic blessing, as I could run all of those last-minute errands which fell by the wayside in such a quick move. I hit the diaper street, where packs of Huggies Gold run about half the price of Wal-Mart or Carrefour. I hit the apartment cum bookstore, where overstocked and slightly mishandled English children's books sell for a maximum of $5 per book. I hit the movie store, where they stock every title you can come up with and sell each for less than $2 per disc. I hit the boutique which takes inspiration from French and Chinese fashion, creating lovely pieces for little girls at truly lovely prices. I hit one of my favorite restaurants for lunch, and another for dinner. I arrived home with a very full backpack, a very full stomach, and a quiet house in which to watch a brand new movie.
This may not sound like a relaxing day, but it was. There was no racing through the amazing heat to meet a particular deadline. There were no children crying, arguing, or pulling on my skirt. There was no cleaning up after one but myself.
And at the end of the day, I still get to sleep in my own bed. I am melancholy to realize how much I enjoy this house and this neighborhood. They would not have been the right fit for our family this year, and so I am relieved to be in a new place. But they are comfortable, charming, and definitely home. I am sad to leave.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Moving in Opposite Directions
Sophia has not napped the entire time we've been in Shenzhen. At least, not until today. You see, her regular naptime is from 2:30 - 4:00 and has been for years. It seems this time was fully ingrained in her system, because moving it up to 1:00 - 2:30 just wasn't working at all. So, we were facing an increasingly tired and grumpy Sophia every day.
Well, today the build-up became strong enough that she fell asleep immediately at 1:00. I woke her up at 2:30 and we've had a perky and cheerful child the rest of the evening.
Unfortunately, things are not so simple for Lilly.
Lilly is a cautious girl who prefers to watch things from the sidelines, observe the situation, and then wait to be invited in before she makes any friends. As of yet, no one has invited her in. She's decided that a new school and new friends are awfully hard, and she really misses the friends she had back in Shanghai. I think that sleep may be a factor for her as well, because she went to sleep at 6:00 this evening. But sleep won't be the only obstacle for her. Making new friends is a challenge for Lilly, and she fully realizes that. The spontaneous playdate with 3 other families this afternoon simply overwhelmed her and had her playing in the corner by herself. Certainly, this did not help her confidence.
I'll admit, I don't have any idea how to help her. Any readers who were shy kids, or parents of shy kids, please pass along any words of wisdom and advice. I know she'll be fine eventually, but that doesn't help her face tomorrow.
Well, today the build-up became strong enough that she fell asleep immediately at 1:00. I woke her up at 2:30 and we've had a perky and cheerful child the rest of the evening.
Unfortunately, things are not so simple for Lilly.
Lilly is a cautious girl who prefers to watch things from the sidelines, observe the situation, and then wait to be invited in before she makes any friends. As of yet, no one has invited her in. She's decided that a new school and new friends are awfully hard, and she really misses the friends she had back in Shanghai. I think that sleep may be a factor for her as well, because she went to sleep at 6:00 this evening. But sleep won't be the only obstacle for her. Making new friends is a challenge for Lilly, and she fully realizes that. The spontaneous playdate with 3 other families this afternoon simply overwhelmed her and had her playing in the corner by herself. Certainly, this did not help her confidence.
I'll admit, I don't have any idea how to help her. Any readers who were shy kids, or parents of shy kids, please pass along any words of wisdom and advice. I know she'll be fine eventually, but that doesn't help her face tomorrow.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Shopping in China
After 3 years, I have fully adapted to China shopping. At least, China shopping as an expatriate. While the cities I've lived in are more developed than many in the world, shopping is still never running to Target and finding the same items on the shelf each time. When you see black beans at the market, you buy them. Whether you need them or not. And if you're within a few months of Christmas and they're selling pumpkin pie filling, buy as many cans as you may need over the holidays.
My general rule: If you see it, and you may need it, you ought to buy it.
This rule gets me in trouble when I am running through Target in the states, as most everything in the store is something I might conceivably need. And its making for some funny purchases in Shenzhen. I've bought string cheese every time I've gone grocery shopping so far. We've now amassed a good stock of it, and I'm beginning to think its not going to disappear from the shelves. I found Comet at the local store, and at a local price. This was on my shipping list - Mom was to go shopping this weekend. So I snatched two bottles of it (they were on sale - 16 RMB total!).
When I got home, I realized two things.
1 - It will take years of regular use to go through 2 containers of Comet.
2 - The apartment provides cleaning ladies every day. They bring their own soap.
My general rule: If you see it, and you may need it, you ought to buy it.
This rule gets me in trouble when I am running through Target in the states, as most everything in the store is something I might conceivably need. And its making for some funny purchases in Shenzhen. I've bought string cheese every time I've gone grocery shopping so far. We've now amassed a good stock of it, and I'm beginning to think its not going to disappear from the shelves. I found Comet at the local store, and at a local price. This was on my shipping list - Mom was to go shopping this weekend. So I snatched two bottles of it (they were on sale - 16 RMB total!).
When I got home, I realized two things.
1 - It will take years of regular use to go through 2 containers of Comet.
2 - The apartment provides cleaning ladies every day. They bring their own soap.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Deep Breathe
Dave tells me I over-reacted. He says there have been a few misunderstandings, and that everything will be fine. He's talking to people and explaining our needs. And whatever Uncle H-- decides, we have the ability to make the choices right for us anyway.
The previous hyperventilating may have been the outpouring of a week-long positive attitude. It is an easy move, a comfortable place, and a friendly community. I have been in conversations every day. We were even invited to a playdate this afternoon. But I'll admit to a touch of plaster behind my smile.
Moving with children is both easier and more challenging. I'm not particularly lonely, because I've got 3 young ladies keeping me company most of the day. They create sparkling conversation and come up with great ideas for things to do. Plus, they keep me busy. Laundry, lunch, and ferrying back and forth to school fill up most of the day.
But they also adjust to a new place differently than I do. I like to just jump right in - accept every invitation, talk to every new face. Lilly prefers to hang back, get the lay of the land, and then become friends with people as they ask her to. The two don't mix very well, and so I'm hanging back alongside my girls. They seem to adjust to place the same way. I'd love to explore every free moment, checking out new restaurants and taking walks in a different direction every day. The girls prefer to stick to the few places which are comfortable, so we eat at home and play at the same playground. I can hardly complain, as it makes my life simple. Exploration will come on the weekends, and may be forced. But it will come, and if lunch and ice-cream are part of the package then we'll have happy girls soon enough.
The previous hyperventilating may have been the outpouring of a week-long positive attitude. It is an easy move, a comfortable place, and a friendly community. I have been in conversations every day. We were even invited to a playdate this afternoon. But I'll admit to a touch of plaster behind my smile.
Moving with children is both easier and more challenging. I'm not particularly lonely, because I've got 3 young ladies keeping me company most of the day. They create sparkling conversation and come up with great ideas for things to do. Plus, they keep me busy. Laundry, lunch, and ferrying back and forth to school fill up most of the day.
But they also adjust to a new place differently than I do. I like to just jump right in - accept every invitation, talk to every new face. Lilly prefers to hang back, get the lay of the land, and then become friends with people as they ask her to. The two don't mix very well, and so I'm hanging back alongside my girls. They seem to adjust to place the same way. I'd love to explore every free moment, checking out new restaurants and taking walks in a different direction every day. The girls prefer to stick to the few places which are comfortable, so we eat at home and play at the same playground. I can hardly complain, as it makes my life simple. Exploration will come on the weekends, and may be forced. But it will come, and if lunch and ice-cream are part of the package then we'll have happy girls soon enough.
Panicking
A horrible sense of dread is rising within me, getting worse the more I think about it. Changing the subject doesn't seem to matter - my mind soon returns.
Today, we received Dave's contract for the new project and the coming year. Most things are unchanged, but they have dropped our housing allowance. As part of a typical expatriate package, the cost of housing is covered by the employer to allow for an employee to maintain a house "back home," and to keep the employee more globally mobile. Our housing allowance seems to have been cut by about $500.
Had we received this news a few weeks ago, it would have had very little impact. We would have looked at housing with the new cap in mind, and settled for what was necessary. However, we were told to expect the same standards as in Shanghai, and so shopped accordingly. We've decided to stay in the serviced apartment, which is about $500 above our previous housing allowance - bringing that newly to $1,000 above.
I certainly ought not whine about needing to pay such an amount in rent every month. But I feel a bit screwed by Uncle H-- here. They said jump, and we jumped - in record time, I might add. We asked all of the appropriate questions and maintained constant communication with the appropriate people throughout all decisions. And now, at the point that all decisions have been made, we receive word that we were operating under the wrong assumptions.
We've arranged to move into this apartment, where we reside at the moment. So, I've bought plane tickets to fly back to Shanghai this weekend. I've arranged movers to pack the house on Saturday, with all of our things arriving in Shenzhen by the middle of next week. As this apartment provides dishes and sheets, I've arranged to sell much of our belongings. And I've informed the agent who showed us around that we are no longer interested in anything else.
This is a decision which needs to be confirmed or changed immediately. There will be a flurry of informing buyers not to pick up towels and tea cups, contacting agents to view new places, changing airline tickets and pushing back the movers. This needs to be confirmed or changed immediately. And unfortunately, I have no faith in Uncle H--'s ability to do that.
The problem is not in possibly having to pay our own rent. The problem is in making choices tethered to a not-so-benevolent uncle who can yank back that chain whenever it feels convenient.
Dave is in Shanghai for the week, which could help. He will be able to walk over to Joyce's desk and have a personal conversation with her, rather than make phone calls and send emails from down here. But it also means that he's not coming home for another few days. And this is the hard part about moving, isn't it? Making new friends is loads of fun, and is happening quickly here. But where's my Bible Study ladies, where I can lay a bomb like this and receive immediate prayer and pats on the back?
Today, we received Dave's contract for the new project and the coming year. Most things are unchanged, but they have dropped our housing allowance. As part of a typical expatriate package, the cost of housing is covered by the employer to allow for an employee to maintain a house "back home," and to keep the employee more globally mobile. Our housing allowance seems to have been cut by about $500.
Had we received this news a few weeks ago, it would have had very little impact. We would have looked at housing with the new cap in mind, and settled for what was necessary. However, we were told to expect the same standards as in Shanghai, and so shopped accordingly. We've decided to stay in the serviced apartment, which is about $500 above our previous housing allowance - bringing that newly to $1,000 above.
I certainly ought not whine about needing to pay such an amount in rent every month. But I feel a bit screwed by Uncle H-- here. They said jump, and we jumped - in record time, I might add. We asked all of the appropriate questions and maintained constant communication with the appropriate people throughout all decisions. And now, at the point that all decisions have been made, we receive word that we were operating under the wrong assumptions.
We've arranged to move into this apartment, where we reside at the moment. So, I've bought plane tickets to fly back to Shanghai this weekend. I've arranged movers to pack the house on Saturday, with all of our things arriving in Shenzhen by the middle of next week. As this apartment provides dishes and sheets, I've arranged to sell much of our belongings. And I've informed the agent who showed us around that we are no longer interested in anything else.
This is a decision which needs to be confirmed or changed immediately. There will be a flurry of informing buyers not to pick up towels and tea cups, contacting agents to view new places, changing airline tickets and pushing back the movers. This needs to be confirmed or changed immediately. And unfortunately, I have no faith in Uncle H--'s ability to do that.
The problem is not in possibly having to pay our own rent. The problem is in making choices tethered to a not-so-benevolent uncle who can yank back that chain whenever it feels convenient.
Dave is in Shanghai for the week, which could help. He will be able to walk over to Joyce's desk and have a personal conversation with her, rather than make phone calls and send emails from down here. But it also means that he's not coming home for another few days. And this is the hard part about moving, isn't it? Making new friends is loads of fun, and is happening quickly here. But where's my Bible Study ladies, where I can lay a bomb like this and receive immediate prayer and pats on the back?
Monday, August 16, 2010
Living in Chinatown
Within Shenzhen, we're settling in the community called Shekou. It has historically been the expatriate community - historically being a limited term, as the entire city is only about 30 years old. Its located on a small peninsula, looking out over the South China Sea and toward Hong Kong. At some point, the Shenzhen government decided to capitalize on the international community and dub it Shekou International Village. They placed a big boat in the center of town and called it Sea World. Its now surrounded by overpriced restaurants selling mediocre food. But fittingly, all of the food is foreign. So we've got Brazilian, Irish, Mexican, Indian and Thai food all within easy walking distance - and all of it overpriced and under-tasty. Amusingly, there is no Chinese food to be found.
I suppose its a lot like living in Chinatown in the states. Americans go there for Chinese food - but the kind that we like to eat; not the kind they serve in China. And you certainly don't go there for a good burger. So, we're trying the foreign places - the Mexican place had really good guacamole! But we're also on the hunt for where the locals eat. At least, the non-foreign locals.
But the big selling point on Shekou is the proximity to Hong Kong. Our family hopped a ferry over to Hong Kong on Sunday morning, and the trip only took us one hour. We met friends for breakfast and the girls were home in time for naps. I stuck around to do some shopping, and then took the 3:00 ferry back - home in plenty of time to make dinner (although Dave always cooks on pizza night). Did some map shopping, some birthday shopping for Lilly, and checked out the grocery stores. And then back out to my foreign suburb for the evening.
I suppose its a lot like living in Chinatown in the states. Americans go there for Chinese food - but the kind that we like to eat; not the kind they serve in China. And you certainly don't go there for a good burger. So, we're trying the foreign places - the Mexican place had really good guacamole! But we're also on the hunt for where the locals eat. At least, the non-foreign locals.
But the big selling point on Shekou is the proximity to Hong Kong. Our family hopped a ferry over to Hong Kong on Sunday morning, and the trip only took us one hour. We met friends for breakfast and the girls were home in time for naps. I stuck around to do some shopping, and then took the 3:00 ferry back - home in plenty of time to make dinner (although Dave always cooks on pizza night). Did some map shopping, some birthday shopping for Lilly, and checked out the grocery stores. And then back out to my foreign suburb for the evening.
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