Six Months In

Yesterday marked the six month anniversary of our arrival in Shanghai. To celebrate the occasion, we had chicken parmigiana (homemade, with Vanilla Almond Special K substituted for bread crumbs) and a frozen cherry pie ala mode.

Six months in to Culture Shock and Living in China, and its interesting to look back at the direction each month took.

September - vacation
We spent less than 2 weeks of September in Shanghai. Dave was not working, and our hotel was located in a very exciting part of town. Although we didn't venture far, it felt much more like vacation than like a move.

October - exciting and new
Dave started work in October, and the girls and I began venturing out further and further. We found ourselves managing at local grocery stores, in Chinese restaurants and walking in the rain. We took our first trip in China, to Xiamen, and got to know Dave's co-workers.

November - moving in
Our lease began on November 1st. We had a large crate to unpack, full of the things of home which felt just wonderful. The excitement of building our new home was wonderful. We had to buy furniture, dishes, bedding, food, nearly everything to outfit a home. We unpacked and we explored our new neighborhood. The weather was often warm and dry, and we enjoyed our new surroundings.

December - overwhelmed
Four months in is a classic time to feel culture shock the hardest - to hate the place, and be ready to leave. Our troubles were further compounded by an unresponsive landlord and many broken items in our apartment, including a broken washer in the midst of travel. The girls and I both spent most of the month sick with a bug which passed through much of Shanghai. Runny noses, headaches and exhaustion lasted about 3 weeks. Life in Shanghai with two young girls is exhausting enough already, but being sick for 3 weeks on top was miserable. I have since learned that this particular bug often affected people neurologically as well, making many patients grumpy and irritable. What bad timing!

January - warily refreshed
We returned from our Christmas holidays having spent a lovely chunk of time together, and having made plans for most of my concrete troubles. These plans would be slowly implemented, over the course of the next few months. But having plans, and having a trip to the U.S. to look forward to helped me maintain my optimist. I made quite a few new friends and started a successful playgroup, but still yearned to return home to St. Louis.

February - home leave
We spent the entire month of January in the states visiting family and friends. It was lovely. We saw every member of our immediate family, and L-- and S-- did quite well both with the many changes and the many faces happy to see them. I reveled in the outpouring of love, and in being surrounded by my family and friends.

But something surprised me. By the end of the month, I was ready to return to Shanghai. Even though we slept in our bed at my parents' house, I felt my bed in Shanghai calling me for a good nights' sleep. We felt a draw to our new home, our routines and schedules, some time alone and our friends.

March - returning home
With all of our planned changes in place, life has improved dramatically. We have a part-time ayi, a full-time driver and we leave Shanghai at least 1 weekend every month. The girls and I get out of the house once a day. And among these changes, we've realized that we like it here. We like the Indian restaurant that deliver hot samosas and soft garlic naan to us on a nearly weekly basis. We like our apartment, the space just large enough to meet our needs. The sun is coming out more and the weather is warming, so that we can enjoy being outdoors in Shanghai. The playgrounds are full on weekday afternoons, and I meet someone new nearly every time we go. And I like my friends. I realized that I do have friends here, and that I am looking forward to continuing to live this life with them.

We invited a few people over for an Easter Egg Hunt on Saturday morning. We expected only 1 or 2 families to attend. At this point, it looks as if we may have as many as 16 adults and 10 children! We do have friends, and we have some exciting ways to get to know people and interesting new ways to celebrate our holidays.

According to a book I have on culture shock, the 6th month tends to be when your settle into life in your new place. And relying on anecdotal evidence amongst my friends, when you decide that Shanghai is home is when you like it more often than you hate it. Both seem to be true for me.