Managing a Staff

I'm getting used to managing a personal staff. The driver has been a no-brainer. I love having someone drive me around. I don't worry about traffic at all - I hardly even notice it. I never turn around yelling pipe down! or keep your hands to yourself! because I'm fully part of the back seat exchange with the girls. We snack, we tell stories, we look out the window together. We have no music to listen to, but no one else in Shanghai seems to have music playing either - we often listen to the neighboring car's cell phone conversation rather than their music. Telling him what time to work and when he has off is no problem for me, and otherwise I let him run his own show. I'm no micromanager.

But with the ayi, its a bit more difficult. I once said that if having an ayi is like living with my mom, than it must be fantastic. Amusingly, it is very much like living with my mom. She doesn't do what I tell her to, but what she does do is often better than my suggestion in the first place. So I've generally no complaints. Minor frustrations at not being in control, but no complaints.

Tonight we left the girls with her. This for the first time. I woke up last night in a cold sweat - how can we leave our children with her? I was not so nervous when I woke naturally in the light of day. She's a mother herself - how bad can it be?

We walked into the house at 10:30 at night. Remnants of dinner still covered the table, and our ayi was nowhere to be seen.

Why didn't she clean up after dinner? I mean, she is the ayi!

Where is she?

Oh my gosh. Did she just leave? Just put the kids to bed, and then go home?

I checked to make sure her shoes were still by the door, in a bit of a panic.

Then she walked out of the guest room, where she had lain down with L--. It seems that L-- didn't want to go to bed by herself, and Xiao Wang laid down by her to comfort her. What a wonderful ayi we have! And how wonderful that L-- was comforted by her presence. We were instantly comforted as well. She began cleaning up from dinner, and we hurried her home.

What we didn't say was that we were happy to leave the dishes in the sink until she returns tomorrow afternoon.