Nothing to Say

I've been writing and rewriting this particular post. Problems seem to arise out of thin air, requiring much more attention then they are really worth. In the midst of dealing with them, I inevitably write a posting on the challenges of accomplishing even the simplest tasks in China. Upon re-reading my writing, I realize how bitter and rambling I sound, and leave the writing until later. Later arrives, and the problems which so angered me before do not seem so important.

Simply put, small problems take immense amounts of energy to fix. Removing the dishwasher. Spraying for bugs. Hanging a fire alarm. The details of these small problems are so complex as to be impossible to convey in simple blog form. Believe me - I've been trying all week.

China is hard. No doubt, China is hard. Wendy agrees that its not nice to push people, and that it can be nauseating to walk through a fish market. China is hard.

But I really must remember to keep things in perspective. An ugly shelf replacing a faulty dishwasher is only worth so much of my energy, before we simply say TIC. This Is China. The energy and bitterness caught up in trying to control my home is simply not worth the end result. We can live happily with an ugly shelf in the middle of our kitchen. And who cares if the fire alarm hangs by a thread, as long as it hangs at all.

The contractors plan to return tomorrow morning, possibly for the last time. I can't decide if I should be here to take answer any last questions and take responsibility for their final actions, or if I should just disappear. It really is not worth the heartache.