Exhausted

I recently saw this headline in the Washington Post: Exhaustion is not a Status Symbol.  I saw the headline, but before I could open the link I dropped my iPad because I realized I had not finished packing the lunchboxes and I did not have the time to sit and read the newspaper that morning. 

Of course, the author is wrong.  Exhaustion is a status symbol in America - especially in northern Virginia.  Stress is highly correlated with success - you can't relax and succeed!  And multiplying the necessary stress for the success of five people places a lot on the calendar of a family of 5.

True - plenty of people are bragging when they share how busy they are.  (Also true - the author talks about Blackberries and getting ahead in business, and not about families and after-school activities. I did skim the article, later.)  Counterpoint - many people are just busy, and normalizing their condition by talking about it.  I am only sharing my experience when I tell you that I am tired this morning.

We had to let our housekeeper go on Monday morning.  This made both Dave and I very sad, and kept us up late on Sunday night discussing our plan.  We woke up at 4:30 on Monday morning to speak with her as soon as she arrived at our house, with our teeth brushed.  And I have not sat down since.  After nearly ten years of mothering, it still surprises me how much work it takes to manage a household of five people.  I speak with authority that our family creates over 2 hours of dirty dishes every day that we eat at home.  Within two days I began wondering, how do I manage the household without help when we live in the US?  One answer is not very well;  another answer is with the help of an automatic dishwasher and the occasional boxed dinner kit.

But the true answer is simply that my life, after 8 months in this country, is planned around leaving the housework for someone else.  And what a joy to have the flexibility to deign my time more worth walking Annika to and from school every day, the long way;  sitting at the table at snacktime and helping Sophia with her homework;  joining Lilly for soccer practice, and for the hour before soccer practice where she reads or snacks or tells me about her day; more worth these activities than folding the laundry and vacuuming under the table again.

We will replace her, but likely not on a full-time basis until this summer.  My parents will arrive as our houseguests in a few days, and they may have to make their own bed every morning.  The household will undergo a sea change as we grow to 7 people, see the culmination of yearlong projects such as the school musical and final soccer tournaments, and sometimes scrub our own toilets.

In a fun addition, I've been spending a lot of time marketing my music classes to grow to two weekly sessions next month.  And I received an email last night informing me that the embassy was beginning my security clearance.  I edited this in my head to read: Congratulations!  We are excited to welcome you to the world of working moms!  Assuming, of course, that we don't discover any nasty and traitorous secrets about you.

I think I need a nap.