Sanur, Bali, Friday through Monday

We hardly strayed from the hotel these days, on our beach vacation. Sanur is a tourist town, and we didn't mind avoiding the traps in town. Especially because most of the restaurants advertised Italian, British or even Mexican food. We sought out Indonesian food at the warungs along the beach - grilled fish, satays, currys, and always fried bananas with honey, ice-cream or black pudding and coconut milk for dessert.

Being our relaxing beach vacation, I didn't journal at all. But the schedule was simple.

Breakfast,



Beach,



Swimming pool,



Picnic,



Nap,



Dinner,



Bedtime.



Each day passed peacefully and relatively uneventfully. The Balinese people are wonderfully friendly, and we enjoyed many conversations with taxi drivers and restaurant staff. The most eventful part of the weekend was our run-in with a rhinoceros beetle.



We left the grounds of the resort for every meal, both to avoid the 20% hotel service charge and to get away from the poor food served at our hotel. A brick path along the beach made this both simple and pleasant each evening. This particular evening, the girls woke early from their naps and we enjoyed a long walk to a small warung away from most of the hotels. The tables sat on the sand, and a German family had brought along beach toys to keep their children amused. They were happy to share. A split log next to a plywood table formed a bar looking out at the ocean, and Dave and I enjoyed a Bintang while they girls played.

We moved to our table once our food arrived. The sun had set and a few bare bulbs hung over the tables. L-- noticed a large bug lying on his back next to the table. He was kicking his legs slowly, and rather amusing to watch. Every so often, we'd peek at him and he kept us all interested.

Until he rolled over. L-- and I both watched as he began to crawl around.

And then he lit off into the air.

Now, this bug was large and black with a hard shell. And by large, I mean hands down the largest insect I have ever seen. Apparently these are some of the largest beetles in the world. We had no idea this was a rhinoceros beetle or that once it gets stressed, it makes a loud hissing sound. But we did learn that he was a horrible flyer, moving slowly, loudly and bumping into things as if blind.

Right above L--.

She screamed, terrified, and did her best to disappear inside of me.

I'll admit, this bug was pretty scary. I covered her and appreciated the excuse to hide my face against her neck. The waitress was as nervous as we were, and sent a guy from the kitchen to bat it down. I didn't see this, but Dave tells me that the guy whacked at the bug and sent it straight down... onto L--'s chair! Imagine the scene if I hadn't already brought her onto my lap!

The young man picked it up, showed it to us and said No problem. No problem. And then walked away with it. L-- wouldn't go near a bug for the rest of the day.

We stayed at the Hotel Mercure Resort Sanur with mixed reviews. We both took advantage of the spa, and its prices and massages were both wonderful. The facilities were lovely, full of gardens and sharp bungalows. The swimming pools were pristine and the beach was gorgeous. But the service was horrible. The shuttle into town left us behind every time. The hot water only ran occasionally. The staff made clear their annoyance when I complained. And 3 of the 4 of us left sick.

We flew out of Bali on New Year's Eve, and with a connection in Singapore we welcomed 2008 with both girls awake watching cartoons at Changi Airport. Both flights were relatively uneventful, and extremely empty. The girls slept, although Dave and I did not. We enjoyed both Singapore and Bali, although I'll admit that my favorite part of the trip was just being a family, together all of the time, for over a week. I miss that already.

Ubud, Bali, Thursday

I'm not much of a travel writer. I can describe my emotions, my itinerary, my children's reactions to their ever changing surroundings. But when faced with incredible natural beauty, I'm left speechless.

After sleeping another night of hour after hour of pounding rain, we awoke feeling cynical about our odds of enjoying our last day in Ubud.

It poured on us the whole walk to town, this time through the monkey forest. I must admit, I was glad for the excuse to hurry through. I definitely prefer my wild animals behind a barrier.

Once at the Ubud market, we bought a large umbrella, which seems to have stopped the rain. We toured the market, shopped and photographed as the rain trickled to a stop and then headed to a path out of town. On the way, we passed a wonderful store called Threads of Life. A certified fair trade retailer, this store is dedicated to supporting and retaining some of the traditional crafts of Indonesia. The least expensive item cost around USD$100, which we decided we couldn't afford. Looking back, I wish we had bought the textile - it was by far the most beautiful piece we saw all week.

Out of the store, and back to our walk. At this point we shared the path with cars and motorbikes, and the sites were primarily tour stalls selling Whitewater Rafting, Downhill Biking and Experience the real Bali! But the path became narrower, the stands became handicraft shops and then homestays, and then bamboo trees, piling up the hills and closing in the trail. We crossed a bridge with children fishing. The trail became dark and hilly as the thick trees met overhead.

Up a hill and around the bend, and the scenery changed dramatically. We were surrounded by rice patties, each in their own pool with small rivers of irrigation tumbling along their edges. Ducks held congress and people wielded machetes as they stood in the mud up to their thighs.

Our trail became a narrow mud path, so slippery in parts that I had to take off my shoes, leading to a paranoid fear of leeches and a minor attack by red ants. Those problems partly becuse I refused to look down with any frequency. The scenery was simply too breathtaking. Coconut palm trees lined our path on either side and framed our pictures of these peaceful green fields of pools. We turned around when we reached a forest, eager to retrace our steps and get a second dose of the scenery.

As we carried 2 large umbrellas, the weather remained perfect the entire time, and is still partly cloudy with a lovely breeze and mild tropical temps. Partly cloudy added to the walk and the swimming pool later, as it made the day and our surroundings feel cheerful and bright without scorching us with its equatorial strength.

We found Ubud overly touristed, dirty and overun with cars and motorbikes. But that walk was enchanting, and reason enough to return.

Ubud, Bali, Wednesday

The open-air shower sounded like the perfect touch in the flyer. Very tropical. Very relaxing. Very sexy.


But upon arrival during a 3-day long tropical storm, it just amounted to a big hole in the bathroom ceiling. Wet toilet seat. Slippery floor. Nowhere dry to hang a towel. It became less sexy, and more of a drag.


But by this evening, the rain had let up long enough to give the girls a bath, and I joined them. And I'm sold again. Feeling the cool breeze in the warm bath, and facing a wet garden in a dim room was quite relaxing. Even with 2 babies splashing next to me.

We hired a car and driver today. Bali is a beautiful island with fantastic scenery throughout, so we took in a few hours of it. The fog was such that the mountain sightings were few and the lake looked more drab then spectacular. But the terraced rice paddies well made up for any disappointments. Too beautiful to describe and too majestic to photograph, sometimes we just stood and stared to take it all in.

Ubud, Bali, Tuesday

Christmas in the tropics.


We woke slowly to the sound of rain pounding on the roof of our bungalow. We arrived at the hotel in the middle of the night, so the four of us bunked together in the large bedroom. So we all woke up together, listening to the rain. The seasoned homeowner in me first thought Oh no! What is being ruined by this rain? But a quick scan of the room showed me that this breezey bedroom was completely sealed from the water and the sound of the raindrops hammering the roof returned from menacing to peaceful.


The rain still hadn't let up by breakfast, but by the time we'd finished our late meal it had diminished to a drip - no more than what fell from the trees. So we walked into town.


The path to Ubud took us through the Sacred Monkey Forest, chock full of monkeys with no containment whatsoever. Not even a fence around the sanctuary. We took a side route, thereby avoiding the tourists feeding crowds of monkeys to create photo ops, and enjoyed watching them from a comfortable 100 meters away.


The town of Ubud left us uninspired. Hundreds of shops selling much of the same - wood carvings, batik dresses, bright minimalist modern oil paintings. They lined a street filled with taxi hawkers and noisy motorbikes. We left the main road in search of a power converter for our camera and enjoyed a more residential Balinese road, with more mangy dogs and skinny chickens in the road than motorbikes or tourists.


We found a fantastic lunch at a small shop specializing in local cuisine and populated mainly by Balinese people, and filled our bellies with coconut chicken, corn fritters, jack fruit, and a curry so hot that L-- burned herself.


Just as she announced I like spicy chicken, she rubbed her eyes.


A little irritation.


So she rubbed again.


Within moments, she was screaming and one of the staff raced her to the sink and splashed water in her face.


She recounted the adventure for days.


Just as naptime began, so too the downpours. They didn't let up all night, which led to a particularly intimate Christmas dinner. A restaurant down the road from our hotel offered a Christmas buffet with turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce and loads of Asian favorites. Each item on the buffet tasted wonderful, but the setting took the cake. We sat outiside on a raised landing, our table low so we could sit cross-legged and the girls could reach or wander. The sloped, thatched roof above our table kept the rain a few feet away. A staff member stood by under our roof, probably there to clear our plates and hand us umbrellas but much more appreciated for holding S-- through most of the meal. In Asia, we are teaching our children not to fear strangers - what a rude shock that change will be when we return to the states!

Somewhere above the Indian Ocean, Monday evening

Garuda Airlines wins points in many categories. They provided toys and baby food for the kids, spare diapers and wipes, and were well stocked on snacks and apple juice. Their hospitality beat the competition. So we wondered, why is this considered a budget airline?

It seems that the skimping is on the planes and the pilots.


The flight to Singapore was bad enough. We boarded, sat for an hour, and disembarked due to undisclosed technical difficulties. We arrived 3 hours late, learning that Shanghai's airport is inconceivably devoid of food but well equipped with a toddler playground near gate 17.


The flight to Bali left 1-1/2 hours late - just after the plane arrived. We didn't mind. We spent the time easily among the multiple playgrounds, cafes and restaurants, gardens and free internet access spread through Changi Airport - clearly a point of pride for Singapore, and rightfully so, especially compared to Shanghai Pudong International. Changi was more decorated for Christmas than anywhere else we'd been in Asia. Santa walked through, certainly refueling the reindeer to begin his own evening of international flight. A long hall strewn with gardlands and Christmas lights prompted L-- to yell Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas! to all of the passers-by on the travelator. Although from this 2-year-old's mouth, it sounded more like Maaaay Kit-mit! Maaaaay Kit-mit!


Once on, the flight was smooth. No trouble, and I could have sworn I saw Santa and his reindeer fly past the window soon after we took off. Nearing the end, captains announced expected turbulence as we began our descent. Rain shot past the windows. The airplane shook. We saw the lights of the runway go right past our windows.

And the airplane began to climb.

I prefer not to know exactly why they chose to abort, but I fear one line of a stressful conversation was simply I can't do it!


We circled for a while, then landed at another airport about 20 minutes away. Most folks disembarked, but at midnight on Christmas Eve our girls had finally fallen asleep so we welcomed Christmas on the plane. It was 3:30 in the morning before we reached our hotel.

Singapore, Monday

I didn't journal on Monday, but the activities of the day are worthy of mention.

We spent the morning at the Singapore Botanical Gardens, where we toured their amazing orchid garden and I must say, I took some photographs that may just rival the good Reverand Doctor - I look forward to sharing them with him. We walked a boardwalk through the native flora and fauna, but whereas that is prairie grasses where I'm from, here it was full-fledged tropical forest. Tall and beautiful. The city has no charge for the gardens, and we enjoyed noticing that they had received funding from the Shaw Foundation linked to the Missouri Botanical Gardens. The gardens were full of families out for a walk with their kids on bikes and roller blades, pulling leashed dogs behind them. L-- took it at her own pace and enjoyed all of the sites. S-- watched everything from the comforts of her father's back.

Next we taxied to another hawker center. This time the Newton Street hawker center, just down the road from Orchard Road, Singapore's most famous road, much akin to Chicago's Magnificent Mile of shopping. In the Singapore nanny state, street vendors require the same level of regulation as any other restaurant and are gathered together in hawker centers. Singapore street food is known to be its best and its cheapest, so we sought out hawker centers for most of our meals.

Singapore, Sunday

I expected Disney World.

Everything I'd heard about Singapore espoused how clean, how safe, how simple to maneuver. My first impressions didn't quite meet Disney's standards - our flight landed 3 hours late, the airline misplaced our stroller, and the lines at immigration stood still. Well, that last bit does sound like the Magic Kingdom, doesn't it?

Available suites in Singapore started at $450 USD, so we chose to go the budget route. The Robertson Quay Hotel had a double room at a quarter the price, so I booked it. How bad could it be? Our double room turned out to be 2 twin beds. We set up 1 travel cot between the two, and the other at the foot of the beds. If we had someone in a sleeping bag by the door, zero floor space would have remained. And that sleeper would not have been able to roll over. But the small room provided plenty of nooks for luggage, and was clean and quiet. This is really all we need.

In a great location, we walked down the river toward the Colonial District. We coated the girls in bug spray and never saw a mosquito. I imagine the Singapore Police don't allow them in. But the equatorial sun blazed, and we had forgotten the sun screen. We soaked up the sun on our walk, but then headed indoors to save our skin. The Asian Civilizations Museum proved the perfect diversion. With brightly textured exhibits safely behind glass, and very few other patrons, both girls explored and gave Dave and I the chance to bone up on our Southeast Asian history and enjoy the sparkling and colorful textiles and native garb, intricate shadow puppets, and other such well displayed exhibits. Extra points to the museum for scattering kids rooms throughout with topical puzzles, dress-up gear and storybooks which enabled us to lengthen our stay considerably.

Upon completion, we explored the Colonial District a bit more. Singapore grew and rose beyond regional prominence under the British Empire and what could just as well be labeled Little England remains the governmental and touristed heart of town, with The Raffles Hotel at its center. The hotel - lavishly decorated for Christmas, which we appreciated - was the peak of class, where the doorman doesn't make you feel bad when he won't allow you in the lobby. The surrounding shopping arcade gave us a taste of the hotel's style and a nice sampling of the Christmas spirit.

Lunch at a rather small and sterile hawker center a block away. The city had begun to feel like Disney World. Every surface sparkling clean, every food vendor regulated, the only litter I saw flew to the floor immediately underneath my childrens' chairs. The sidewalks are smooth, every busy street has an underpass for pedestrians and getting around with children feels both safe and comfortable. Its a bit like a visit to a new shopping mall in the states - engineered to maximize your experience.

And engineered to the hilt - Singapore is the ultimate nanny state, with $1,000 fines for riding your bike on underpasses and smoking barred from all public places. The government removed pollution from the river, which included removing the coolies and transport boats and displacing loads of folks who made their living on the water. The riverfront was revitalized, which meant removing any shacks or urban poor who may have frequented there. Of course its pleasant, but it also feels unreal - nobody actually lives in Disney World, and there are plenty of dressing rooms and break rooms behind the scenes.

An evening in Little India took us behind the scenes. Apparently members of the large Indian community fill the low-income positions in Singapore and life there felt less regulated. Dinner in the hawker center certainly felt less sterile. Loud conversations and bright lights filled the open air food court. Many tables held groups of men just enjoying hot Indian tea or a beer together. The attached market was just as lively, with piles of red, brown and golden spices, mounds of brightly colored fruit and row upon row of butchers slamming their knives through bones to create the cuts they would sell. The place was teeming and the crowds spilled into the streets, where men stood in clumps lost in discussion, crowding on the sidewalks and into the streets such that most cars just chose to go around. Shops and restaurants were all open and brightly lit, inviting people to their produce, floral temple offerings, electronics and vegetarian food. But it seemed that, like the teens at the mall on a Saturday night, most of the men filling the streets - and they were all men - were more interested in talk than in the brightly showcased goods. As we walked, it became clear that the crowds had spilled into the market and not the other way around, as this business spread for many blocks. We were charmed.

It was Dave's turn to share bedtime with the girls, and I got to spend the evening out of the room. I did some quick grocery shopping - where I coveted the many Western products available, and the labels written in English - and ended an entirely successful day with a Singapore Sling at the hotel's riverfront bar. We managed to keep the girls well fed, well slept and well amused the entire day. Maybe we're getting this figured out!

Daily Details

I tried to pay all of our November bills. Successful on some counts, a failure on others, I thought some of you may be interested in the amounts:

Water - 47.80 RMB $6.50

DSL - 196.50 RMB $26

Electricity - 434.20 RMB $58

Gas - 0 RMB $0

Home phone with long distance - 91.80 RMB $12.25

In other news, I've belatedly posted my journal from our trip to Bangkok. It's backdated, so begin reading on Friday, December 7th and read through Sunday, December 16th.

Oh, and within 2 days of my losing my cell phone, Dave left his Blackberry in the taxi. At least Uncle H-- has to eat that one!

We leave early tomorrow morning for Singapore and Bali, to return on January 1st. We are bringing neither computer nor Blackberry. I am so looking forward to these 11 days of pure family travel time.

Merry Christmas!

A Whole Month? Fantastic!

I was talking to Lucy this morning. Her parents are flying in tonight for Christmas.

Lynne: How long will they stay?

Lucy: About a month. My brother and sister will be here for a week, as well, starting Sunday.

Lynne: Wow - a whole month. That's fantastic! How nice for you!

And then it occurred to me. I would never have this conversation in the states. Were someone to tell me they had family coming for a month, I would lower my voice to a sympathetic register and slowly say, Wow - a whole month. I'm sorry. How will you manage?

I firmly believe that everyone who chooses this lifestyle is by nature an outgoing person. Making friends is easy enough, and we can be quite content with people we've only known for a few hours, days or months. But there's nothing like spending time with someone who's known you for years. It's like eating a healthy diet, but never getting ice-cream. You can live a happy life without ice-cream, but a bit of you is craving it daily.

I speak from experience on the ice-cream, by the way. Half a tub of Dryer's costs $10.

My conversation with Lucy, and with another mom this morning, confirmed to me what I have learned repeatedly in the past. I am an inherently social person. I can be happy in most any situation, if I have people to talk to. Today is no more or less frustrating than the rest of the week, but I feel so much happier because I've had those two conversations this morning.

Not Holding My Breath

Just as everyone in Shanghai has left their wallet in a taxi, so have they lost their phone. Now I can join the ranks.

In China, you purchase your phone at full price. You then purchase your phone number and your minutes. From that point on, your phone and your phone number belong to you and you just pay for your minutes. If you buy a cheap phone and don't lose it, its a good deal. I bought an expensive phone, and lost it after about 3 months. That's $200 for the phone plus maybe $50 for minutes over the last 3 months - around $80 a month for my cell phone plan so far.

That makes me feel better - I was paying $75 a month for a phone I used much less regularly in the states.

Dave and I celebrated our anniversary this evening, with babysitters, shopping, dinner and dessert. In the cab coming home, I reached for my phone to tell the girls we were on our way. My phone was gone. The last time I used it was calling Dave from the first cab, at the beginning of the evening. I've no way to track down that cab, or to find the phone.

When I got home, I told our babysitters that I'd lost my phone. They told stories about how they had each lost 3 phones, and their parents had lost a few as well. That made me feel better, too.

We called the phone, and it said it was powered off. That means that someone took out the SIM card and will plug a new phone number into the phone. Picking up your phone in a cab makes for a really good monthly rate.

And while cab drivers always return wallets, they never return phones.

Next time, I'll buy a cheaper phone.

And back up my phone book.

A Rainy Finish

We woke the girls too early this morning, although they were both incredibly smiley for 6:30 in the morning. Bangkok traffic was minimal and we rode watching the early morning sun turn the river a reddish shade of gold, and the city slowly wake up. We snacked at the airport, burned off steam, and entered the last stretch of our journey. The 5 hour plane ride. Since the flight wasn't full, they allowed us a seat for S-- and having a pack of 4 seats made the flight much more pleasant. Both girls made friends with everyone around them, enjoyed their lunches and their tours of the cabin. L-- stretched out and fell asleep for nearly an hour, and S-- fell apart completely. She spent most of the last hour screaming and thrashing in our arms. Overtired, she wanted to either stretch out and sleep or crawl on the floor and climb on strangers. We made neither option available to her, and she had enough of us. Upon arrival, we carried too many bags and stood in too many lines for any of our tastes. We walked out the doors past customs, and China barraged us. Throngs of people pushed to watch as everyone came out the doors. Other passengers pushed each other, once knocking someone over. We pushed our way to the street, only to find the wait for a taxi looked to be over an hour, in the rain.

By the grace of God, an attendant of some sort pushed us to the front of the line and piled us into a handicapped taxi. With piles of luggage and two sleepy children, it felt entirely appropriate to be considered disabled and we accepted quite willingly. The girls took turns screaming until they both fell asleep the last 20 minutes of the rainy ride home. Dinner was delivered, baths were taken, little bodies wrapped in warm jammies, and Dave and I sat down to catch our breath.

The girls clearly feel at home here. They both kept themselves happily amused rediscovering their toys and reading their books throughout the evening. They fell right to sleep in their own beds. Dave and I spoke at length this past week about feeling trapped and unhappy where we live, so seeing the girls feel so at home provided comfort and warmth.

It was 9:30 and raining, we had no groceries, and the store closed at 10:00. I threw back on my shoes, jogged to the store, and was ushered out at the strike of the hour. I had all I needed, and was happy to let them finish their work and prepare to go home.

I walked home in the rain. Warm from my run, the cool air and cold drops felt good. Overwhelmed from my travels and my life, just being alone on a cool evening cleared my head. I watched the cars go by, and marveled that I had never seen so few people on the streets of Shanghai. I walked past the Jin Mao Tower and the World Financial Center, and felt as though I were walking through a suspense movie as the fog encircled the tops of both buildings. I thought about making the most of things. I waited patiently for the pedestrian light, and stepped out as it flashed green. A taxi swerved to avoid me, and the bus and a string behind didn't even notice. My light was green. So was theirs. What is wrong with this city?

Tips for Travel with Young Children

Stay near the action
If your hotel is right in the middle of things, a stop to rest won't mean the end of your day. Avoid hotels where you must taxi to reach the majority of your destinations.


Stay somewhere pleasant and entertaining
Dealing with naptimes and children's bedtimes may force you to wile away hours at your hotel; plus, sometimes kids need a breather and a day at the pool or walking the grounds is well spent.


Don't sacrifice naptime
You may be able to move it, scrunch it, or bring it along; but you must plan for it or you will regret skipping it.


Pack the necessities
Diapers, wipes, formula, butt paste. Even if the book says they're easily available; you may not want to spend the time seeking them out.


Always carry snacks and water
Two things will certainly derail a young child: hunger and lack of sleep. Carry things like crackers and oranges, and at least you avoid the one.

Bangkok, Sunday

Although the Bangkok Marriott Resort and Spa is a pleasant place to while away hours and days with your family, it is also a place to be conscious of your budget or travel without a budget. We paid more to launder our clothes than we did to purchase them originally... in the states. Each meal cost more than its value in America, but was the only walkable option outside the likes of McDonalds and KFC in front of the hotel. Babysitting cost per child per hour, although the Kid's Club is free if your children are over 3. The Mini Bar robs you, as any Mini Bar does. Feeling a bit trapped in my hotel room, I was more decadent than usual and felt rather fleeced by the end of the trip.

Bangkok, Saturday

Our week in Bangkok draws to a close with a good day. After a week on my own with 2 young kids in Bangkok, Dave joined us today and it felt smooth and interesting.

We hopped the Tourist Express to the Northernmost stop - we began with a water taxi to the Southern stop. The ride from South to North took us from expensive resort-style hotels, glamorous brand-name shopping, Western meals with inflated prices, and Fodor's and Insight Guides; to the land of Lonely Planet, markets, street vendors selling unrecognizable food, signs for cheap internet access and used book stalls. This is more our style of travel. Less Prada handbags. More dredlocks and sarongs.

I am struck that either place, we were surrounded by Western tourists. It seems that Bangkok, even more than Shanghai, is an international city where tourists pay to see what they want to see. At the Marriott, they pay to see Thai dancing and kick boxing but also hospitality, climate, gardens and shopping. In the Lonely Planet section, its pedestrian streets and street vendors, tuk-tuks and food markets. Notably, there's tooth whitening, face waxing and Botox in both. It seems that Thai people either live in relative poverty, or much like us. That's hardly worth visiting.

Bangkok seems like a wonderful place to spend a few days relaxing and shopping, whatever your budget - a modern, international city - and then a good jumping off point for rural Thailand.

Bangkok, Thursday and Friday

By this time, things had gotten pretty dicey. We didn't see Dave for more than a few minutes Monday through Wednesday. The lack of true human interaction had gotten to me by Thursday, and we struggled a bit. I'd stopped journaling, and my patience wore thin. But we did manage to taxi out through Bangkok's legendary traffic.

After the standard readying, the girls and I jumped a cab to the Dusit Zoo. We lounged in the back, as Bangkok's taxis are much comfier than Shanghai's. The taxis in Bangkok were all Corollas, and Shanghais are VW Santanas. They just sound nicer, don't they? As we lounged, the driver hit the gas and L-- flew right off the seat and flat onto the floor. This shook her up a bit, with the positive result of getting her to sit still for the next few minutes. The moment she wiggled again, she flew right onto the floor once more. The two-fer made her a lover of the seat belt, so we rode in relative safety for the first time in months.

There seems to be some debate over zoos, whether they are depressing or so nice that the guests never see the animals. I'm afraid I'm no judge either way, but it probably says something that in this zoo we were able to see loads of animals. We passed monkeys, ponies, lions and tigers, deer and pands, zebras and giraffes. L-- enjoyed all of them, and still talks about the animals a week later. The taxi ride back went by a different route, and only took 20 minutes. Bangkok traffic.

In the evening, I got another taxi ride. Dave had the evening off and told me to go out on my own. So with the girls in bed, I braved the traffic once more and headed to Suan Lum Night Market.

In many ways, Bangkok seemed like any other modern city. But in one way, Bangkok stood out from all other cities. The shopping was incredible. The Chatuchak Market on Saturday, and now the Suan Lum Night Market this evening. Beautiful silks, pashminas, boutiques and more for sale at outrageous prices. This one stayed open until after midnight, which was loads of fun. Walking through the warm night air, seeing each stall lit up with strings of bright colored lights, watching people stop for dinner, the market had a completely different air about it.

Friday, the girls and I stayed at the hotel and relaxed. Dave's seminar ended by 4:00 and we were able to begin our weekend as a family. Dinner, ice-cream and the swimming pool completed our day.

Bangkok, Wednesday evening

By way of explanation, Dave began his week of meetings on Monday morning. The girls and I spent every other day in relaxation at the hotel - so Monday, Wednesday and Friday we lounged, ate, swam and played.

This afternoon, S-- took a 2 hour nap, and then ate 2 oranges while L-- took a 2 hour nap. Still throwing incomprehensible fits, she was certainly more pleasant. And boy was I right on the laundry - just over USD100 plus 15% VA. I'm not sure I paid that much originally for the clothes in the states!

Bangkok, Wednesday afternoon

Lesson learned today:

It's cheaper to buy new clothes in Bangkok than to have the old ones laundered at the Marriott.

This morning she cried at waking, for about an hour. She cried during most of breakfast, because she saw a bottle. She did not cry at all in the Kid's Club. She cried through most of lunch because there was too much medicine is one of her bites. She cried until naptime, tired.
Now she's been crying for about 10 minutes because I won't give her the pen I'm using. Inconsolable. Undistractable. And I hate that I can turn on her so quickly and feel an entire lack of sympathy, a coldness toward her when she launches into these long fits. Because as soon as pleasant S-- returns, I want to play and snuggle and talk. But a few minutes of a fit, all I can do is walk away.

Bangkok, Tuesday

Lessons learned today:

1. Don't mess with naptime

2. Beware the peppers in your Thai curry

In honor of S--'s 1st birthday, I decided we must venture out. Boat - Skytrain - Mall to the aquarium in the basement. At full price for myself and half price for L-- (being over 80 cm tall), the price was pretty steep. But it provided a good place to while away an hour or so. L-- set the pace, deciding which tanks to cruise by and which fish to study. I decided that when I am an architect specializing in public spaces, I will design museums with two tracks to keep the schools of children separate from the rest of us. A tank showed a school of fish moving together as with one motion, much like the swarms of children piling past us. Still, the larger tanks kept everyone occupied and the aquarium had a toddler area blissfully free of school uniforms.

Proud of myself for managing to feed the three of us in the mall food court - a shopping cart for both stroller and high chairs, and unidentified food - I ignored the clock and shopped for treats. Bears for the girls - after all, it was S--'s birthday. And novels for me - I read an impressive amount when keeping toddler hours. It was after 3:00 when we arrived back at the room, but my real downfall was that I had allowed S-- to sleep on the boat. Although it would have been mighty hard to prevent. Crying in the backpack, she threw her head back to howl and fell dead asleep. Head thrown back and mouth wide open. By the time I stepped off the boat, her whole body was limp and she was in a heavy sleep. Those sound 20 minutes prevented both her and her sister from napping the rest of the afternoon.

Dinner at the onsite restaurant, I shot for affordability. The girls shared macaroni and cheese, and I ordered Thai vegetable curry. Mighty tasty, but one bight of a red pepper and my mouth burned for the next hour.

Bangkok, Monday

I feel a bit like the life I want is just beyond my reach. As if by caring for my children, I'm relegated to living like a child - eating dinner when I'm told, napping every afternoon, and going to bed while the band still plays outside. A day of rest did not yield much sleep and the girls still spent much of the day fussing and bickering. Sitting in a darkened room listening to the music waft up from the riverside terrace below, its hard not to be resentful of Dave as he's off checking in with his office and catching up with his co-workers.

Still, in such a comfortable resort, its hard to complain. The grounds have plenty of paths far long enough for a 2-year-old's legs. Staff often stop to amuse us, playing drums and cutting flowers for the girls. The children's room is bright, clean and full of amusing toys.

Rather ironically, our lunch at McDonald's may have been the best part of our day. We sat near the play area, as this is where they placed the high chairs. A troop of Thai children between 3 and 5 years old set up camp next to us, eating ice cream cones and teasing each other. L-- finished her Chicken McNuggets quickly as they coaxed her into the playground with them and I watched my normally shy little girl disappear out of her shell and into the bright tubing of the playground.

Bangkok, Sunday

Our children can be remarkably well-behaved and able to amuse themselves if we keep them well-rested and well -ed. We all fell short in our missions today. With coughs lying in each of our throats, we kept each other awake for hours last night, so both girls started the day at a deficit. Although we kept them in fresh bananas and oranges through the morning, naptime came late and pushed back dinner.

That said, we guided ourselves through two of Bangkok's must-sees today, all seen via the river. The hotel water taxi ferried us to the Central Pier where we bought unlimited rides on the Chao Phraya Tourist Express Boat for 100 baht (about $3 USD). It turns out one ride only cost 15 baht - lesson learned. The river took us to the heart of Bangkok, really the heart of Thailand. The Royal Palace was built as a showpiece for the nation and along with the Temple of the Emerald Buddha shows beautifuly. No buildings were open, which gave the girls ample time to walk around outside and enjoy themselves.

The National Royal Palace

The Temple of the Emerald Buddha

Next we walked next door to the Temple of the Reclining Buddha. Both of these temples require appropriate dress - although it seemed they only enforced the no shoes rule. Still, we all got a kick out of walking in a public place in our stocking feed. The paintings on the walls kept both girls entertained and Lilly loved the plink plink of coins falling into rows of small tin pails as offerings. Although the world-renowned school for Thai massage lets their students practice on tourists outside the temple, we sadly decided that the girls couldn't wait the 30-minutes, so we grabbed lunch and headed back for a late nap and some time by the pool.

The Reclining Buddha

"plink, plink"

The hotel fronts a shopping center with a wide variety of goods and cheaper eats, so we grabbed a Thai meal and headed straight to bed. A run to the Lotus/Tesco/Esso down the street yielded diapers and wipes, setting us up for the week to come.

Bangkok, Saturday

To make up fo the late night, we allowed ourselves to sleep until we almost missed breakfast. The buffet, included in the price of our upgraded room, included many international favorites from pancakes and fresh fruit to fried rice and pickled vegetables. Dave ate Asian, but the girls and I filled up on watermelon and sweet breads. With high chairs for the kids and shaded tables facing the river, it made a lovely start to our day. After lunch we took the hotel's water taxi down the river. Even though it clearly serves as a garbage-filled city thoroughfare, a ride along the river was pleasant and the smell of our freshly applied bug spray covered any scent of the garbage floating by. The boat dropped us at the Skytrain - childfriendly except for the sporadic escalators. We took it all the way to the end, to the Chatuchak Weekend Market.

The market is stall upon stall selling anything you can think of. Apparently this market runs to over 35 acres and is the largest outdoor market in the world. In the midst of it, its hard to tell that its outdoors, although in the middle of the hot season I'm sure that the crowds seething through the small aisles and into the matchbox shops, one on top of another, would feel the hottest place in town and one would no doubt remember they're outside.

We spent longer than intended in the pet section, watching piles of puppies, mice, kitties and a woman with nearly immobile chipmunks placed along her arms and legs. Her sign read NO PHOTOS, or I certainly would show you. We saw candlesticks, clothes, kitchen tools and more in the hours we spent wandering up and down, and yet we barely scratched the surface. Food stands abound, selling loads of freshly cooked morsels, if you can get past the lack of refrigeration before your chicken hits the grill. Noisy, busy and brightly colored, the market kept our girls interested for hours, and was certainly the most fun Dave has ever had while shopping.

We tried skipping naps entirely, and ended up with a cranky bunch by 4:00 so we spent the evening exploring the hotel. With multiple restaurants, a beautiful pool with kiddy corner, a children's club and a spa, the girls and I could keep ourselves happily amused here while Dave spends his week in meetings. We certainly whiled away an easy evening.

Bangkok, Friday

We left the airport to a blast of thick, tropical air. Warm and humid at 10:00 at night. The Bangkok heat in December turned out to be quite comfortable. Temperatures hovered in the mid- to upper-80s with relatively high humidity. Wearing shorts and T-shirts, and dipping in the pool to cool off helped us not to notice the warmth. Rather, we felt bizarre hearing Christmas music and thinking about the time of year. How could it be this warm in December?

At the airport, Dave made the rookie mistake of hiring a car without a meter, and once piled into the car the price rose by a few hundred baht. We haggled the entire way to the hotel, and left a very frustrated driver with the originally agreed upon price. But once here, we knew we had arrived. This week we travel on Uncle H--'s dime, and in Bangkok he does not disappoint. The Bangkok Marriott Resort and Spa immediately made a good impression. As Dave checked us in, I and two very sleepy little girls lounged on the couches dotting the check-in lounge. Smiling staff brought us chilled fruit juice and kept the girls smiling. We chose to upgrade to a suite, in the hopes that the extra space would be family friendly, and we're glad we did. With no walls to separate sleepers, the suite at least buys us a luxurious amount of space (plus a free mini-bar and a huge bathub). We set up the girls' travel beds - some of the best baby gear we have ever bought - and each of us fell asleep as our heads hit the mound of soft pillows.

I Hate It Here

I've said it out loud. I hate it here.

The dryer broke down, full of sopping wet socks and t-shirts.

The faucet stopped working. It will only blast scalding hot water.

The bathrooms both hold a funky smell - strong, funky, and not from our bodies.

Dave worked all night last night and is bordering on being late today.

And then there was yesterday. And this whole prior week, where all 4 of us have been sick for over 1 week each.

We fired our ayi before she even started because she kept upping her price.

I can't do it anymore. I hate it here.

Homecoming

The flights for the following itinerary have been confirmed, not any change, non refund. We are coming home!

Jan 31 - Fly from Shanghai to Chicago
Feb 5 - Drive from Chicago to St. Louis
Feb. 12 - Fly from St. Louis to London, England (the girls will stay in St. Louis)
Feb. 17 - Fly from London to St. Louis
Feb. 21 - Drive from St. Louis to Chicago
Feb. 26 - Fly from Chicago
Feb. 27 - to Shanghai

With the Bad-China-Day I'm having, I wish it were sooner... and for much longer.

Leaving tomorrow for Bangkok for a week.

1st Birthday

We celebrated S--'s birthday today. The big ONE YEAR. Somehow, this little ball of snuggles has managed to keep the symptoms of collic for a full year - quite impressive, really. And a fact for which I intend to receive pats of sympathy from other mothers for years to come.


But despite the random outbursts of screaming and inconsolability, S-- has also grown into a delightful and unique individual. Her hair short, dark and straight frames her face as a boy, and her darker colors best complement her complexion so often the poor girl is taken for a boy. She seems not to mind a bit. In fact, S-- has a grin for any person she sees. In a full elevator, she can have every adult talking to her. Walking down a busy street, she sometimes manages to turn every head. In the land of black hair and dark skin, her light skin and thin hair draw attraction everywhere she goes. The same is true of her sister, with blue eyes and blonde hair. But while her sister withdraws from every stranger's touch, S-- revels in it. She will talk to anyone, as long as they will talk to her.


She delights in sharing what makes her smile - from placing a Cheerio in your mouth, to gasping as she places a leaf on your lap. She will eat anything, from spicy Indian food to steamed peas.


She is a difficult child, prone to temper tantrums and long crying spells. But she is also a strong child, learning to comfort herself and able to catch herself when she falls. She loves being in the company of others, and she revels in her newfound ability to explore the world around her.

She is most at home in the water. She can spend hours at the pool, and endless time in the bathtub. She doesn't flinch if a bucket of water is dumped on her head. And whereas on dry land, she tumbles all over, in the water she may slip, but her face never touches the water.

Her smile is infectious. Her body is so snuggly. And when she is not driving me mad, she is an amazing little girl.

The cake tasted good, even though it took 20 minutes longer to cook because the oven wouldn't maintain a constant temperature. The frosting tasted good, even though it hardened too fast and we had to eat it like candy on the side. The ice-cream tasted good, even though they had no vanilla. Opening the presents was fun, even though there was no family to share.

Despite the negatives, all of the positives were true. We shared a lovely birthday party with our friends. We ate tasty cake and ice-cream and opened many fun presents. We had a lovely evening. And we are all exhausted.

Drinking Tea

I've been knocked out sick since Thursday afternoon. This has led to some comic scenes in our house. Ones where our kitchen and dining room resemble movie sets, with every dish sullied and paper plates strewn about, every surface covered with some sort of food and empty milk cartons lying sideways on the counter.

My main symptom is a sore throat. The cure for this sore throat is hot drinks. Luckily, I reside in China, the home of tea.

Hot tea can be bought anywhere, and comes in three basic styles:
green tea - where the leaves are the least processed, and still look much like leaves
oolong tea - somewhere in the middle, although I don't understand the process
red tea - black tea, in the West; where the leaves are the most processed, and look more like herbs

You can order any of these three teas at a tea house, and you will be served. It is akin to ordering a glass of white wine at a restaurant. The wait staff will simply choose which variey for you. And the varieties are very, very many. I've found a few I like and can remember, although none that I don't like. Dave is the same.

Tea is served differently in China. There is no steeping, and the leaves are not kept separate. Leaves are placed in the bottom of a teapot. Hot water is poured on top. You immediately pour your first cup of hot tea. The wait staff generally refill the hot water in the teapot quickly. If you reach the bottom of your teapot, the dregs will be leaves. Sometimes you will see people with leaves in their teeth, and know they've just finished a thermos of tea.

This is the other notable thing about tea in China. It is drunk everywhere. Every taxi driver keeps a thermos of tea just under his right elbow, and drinks from it while he drives. Street vendors will have a glass jar sitting at their feet, full of hot water with leaves floating at the top. Ceremony is not the important part - just the tea.

Most teas have different powers, much like medicine. Some are for sour stomachs, some are for fertility, some are for old age. I'm quite confident there exists a tea for any conceivable ailment.

Traditionally, the Chinese do not order drinks with their meals. They drink tea or they drink soup, which is always a broth of some sort - never cream based. As fruit juices become popular, this is less true. Often you'll see a table at a restaurant with everyone drinking from tall, frothy, bright pink watermelon juices. They taste fantastic.

Becoming a bit more Chinese

We took a foray into China this weekend.

Yes, we live in China. But its easy to forget, if we keep to the right places. Our compound is quite international, and most of the staff speak English. I shop at the import grocery store, where they stock plenty of cheese and cookies.

Across the street from the main entrance to our compound is an alley. Step through the gate, and you step into China. You don't hear English, and you rarely see it written. They're not selling muffins or pizza, although they are selling DVDs. We walked along past markets and food stalls, ordered various tidbits for lunch and chatted with a few locals.

2 orders steamed dumplings: 6 RMB
1 order fried rice: 5 RMB
2 bottles water: 5 RMB

This meal fed a family of 4. Granted, 2 of the four have pretty little bellies. Still, when you're in the real China, its amazing how far your money goes. 16 RMB is just around USD$2.

And I've got to brag a bit. I ordered the fried rice entirely in Chinese. I'll admit, I did a lot of saying I'd like that, but I also asked her a question and understand everything she said to me. I guess I learned something in my language class.

Devil keeps us from Church

I don't have a very good understanding of good and evil, and I certainly don't have a formed opinion on how active the devil is in the world. But I do know that we had a really hard time making it to church on Sunday morning.

We gave up on the two Protestant English-language churches in Shanghai because they both hold services during naptime.

We tried small groups, but bringing the girls made it difficult to participate.

Then we were connected to this "Sunday School," which is not a state-sanctioned church. The government allows it because a large business owner asked to establish it. Rather than lose his business, they allowed him to establish a "Bible Study" near his office. But don't call it a church.

The first week, we hopped in a taxi and called our connection for directions. Our connection had turned off his phone. We went out for brunch instead.

The second week, we contacted someone else for directions. She emailed them. We couldn't print them until Monday.

The third week, the store delivered our Christmas Tree between 10:00 and noon on Sunday morning. When you don't speak the language, you have very little room for negotiation on things such as these.

This week, S-- was up for over an hour in the middle of the night. I was feeling sick. L-- slept late, usually a sign that she's coming down with something, too.

But we forged ahead, and made it. The building was rather small, and the sanctuary was full. There was a baby room in the back with about 4 other 2-year-olds very close to L--'s age. The parents were friendly, and the service was piped into the room over a loud speaker. The preaching was a bit conservative for my tastes - but I figure its not fair to judge a preacher on his interpretation of the verse telling women to submit to their husbands.

We really enjoyed it, and plan to return. The drawback is that it starts at 10:00am and its a 45 minute taxi ride away. Our girls usually sleep until 9:00, so that makes it a rough morning. But worth it, we hope.