Final Home Choice

I recognize that with the career Dave has chosen, I may not be able to choose my own home for many, many years. At foreign posts, housing is assigned based on each family's answers to a questionnaire. Gotta love the government - especially as we are asking it to run every single aspect of our lives.

So I particularly relish our new home. We moved in on Thursday, and still have boxes piled around the house and no internet connection. We've got a rather seedy looking internet cafe across the way, with a man rather grossly masticating to my right. We make do.

The walls were spot painted only, but they look fine.
The water runs hot, the mosquitos swarm the garden in amazing clouds, and the roaches on the sidewalks look like they escaped from the zoo. But I have seen nothing larger than a fly indoors, and our rooftop terrace is amazing. The details in this house are absolutely lovely, and we have it fully furnished and feeling quite cozy.

As a lane house, we are surrounded by Chinese families living in old homes. Many of our neighbors have their kitchens across the lane from the rest of the house, and a crowd often gathers late into the night playing mahjong on the stoop across the garden. Its quiet and people all smile at us. Its lovely.

The former French Concession has slow-moving streets with wide sidewalks, plenty of old plane trees providing full-shade and protection from the rain. We can walk to loads of good restaurants - many of the best in town. Loads of boutique shops are in our neighborhood, and I'm loving the 3 minute commute to school every morning.

As a consequence of this shortened commute, we had to let our driver go. The worst news of our move, and even this has serious upshot - we save over $1,000 per month. Our sweet driver has calmly negotiated the travails of Shanghai traffic for us over the past 6 months, and we have enjoyed his company as well as his expertise. Last night, he sent a lovely message. The internet translation may be the most touching part:

I want to say:you are very honored to service,that is too short.If you are in shanghai,although there is a need I say,I am very willing!Finally Thank you very much they help me to find another job.

I will miss his company and his help, but I am happy that he starts his new position tomorrow.

We have found places for all of our things, and already enjoyed the terrace over many evenings. We have a great room encompassing the kitchen, dining room and living room. We ate dinner at the kitchen table tonight, the first home-cooked meal in the house. And how lovely, to enjoy the family and the music while I cooked. Plus, family clean-up was a breeze!

After all of my worries, I have no complaints about this home. And knowing that its the last time I will choose my own home, I am loving it for as long as we are here.

Update to Scene 3

The girls went to school this morning. Dave went to work. I went to Bible Study. So Wendy went to the new house to meet the painter. I called her over lunch for an update. Another wonderful dialogue followed. I should point out that I avoid telephone conversations with non-native English speakers at all costs. Especially mobile phone conversations. Far too difficult.

Wendy: Hello, Lynne.
Lynne: Hi, Wendy. What's going on today?
Wendy: The furniture was delivered. It is in the upstairs bedroom.
Lynne: Great.
Wendy: The painter came. He will return this afternoon, or maybe tomorrow.
Lynne: How does it look? Did he do a good job?
Wendy: It looks just the same.
Lynne: I'm sorry. I must not have heard you. How does it look?
Wendy: It looks just the same. He painted a few spots and it does not look different.
Lynne: He didn't paint the whole wall?
Wendy: No, just a few spots.
Lynne: And it does not look better?
Wendy: No, it looks just the same. There are still spots on the wall.
Lynne: Did you tell him to paint the whole wall?
Wendy: Yes, I told him. He says that his boss only instructed him to paint the spots.
Lynne: The man who was there yesterday?
Wendy: Yes, the same man.
Lynne: I think this is a bad man. I think he does not like me.
Wendy: (laughing) Yes. He said yesterday that the walls are very clean and do not need painting.
Lynne: This makes me very angry. (a stream of rambling about movers coming tomorrow and furniture being against the walls and people not listening or doing what they say they will do). This makes me very angry.
Lynne: What do you think we should do?
Wendy: I think we should let the paint dry, and see how it looks. If it looks bad, we will ask him to return and paint the whole wall.
Lynne: (another stream of rambling about furniture in the room and busy schedules and kids sleeping in the house and ventilation) So we need to wait?
Wendy: Yes, we need to wait.

I fear that this bodes quite badly for cooperation with our landlord on any problems we may encounter. Impractical. Translation: lovely, but stupid. At least I have Wendy to help me! Where would I be without my own, trusted, personal translator and assistant?

Dialogue at the Hand-Over

I was handed the keys to our new home this morning. We will move from our high-rise, 225 square meter apartment into an old, old house down a little Chinese lane with 150-170 square meters and no closets. Not kidding about the no closets bit. Not even those wardrobe things. Hardly even cabinets in the kitchen. Conversations from this morning.

Cast of Characters:
Myself: The stupid Westerner
Wendy: My ayi, a native Mandarin speaker but also nearly fluent in English
Tony: Our agent, a native Mandarin speaker who also speaks English, but always mixes up his pronouns
Contractor: The man sent by the landlord to answer questions and move furniture

Scene 1
Inside the kitchen of the new house
Wendy: This house is very nice (clear implication that she is surprised).
Lynne: Yes, very nice. Just not very practical.
Wendy: What does "practical" mean?
Lynne: Um, it means that the house is lovely, but we are stupid to live here.
Lynne: (opening kitchen cabinets) See, these cabinets do not hold storage. They cover old pipes.
Wendy: Oh my.
Lynne: (walking into storage room) This is our 2nd bedroom, but we will have to keep food and dishes in here from the kitchen.
Wendy: The door is missing!
Lynne: (climbing the stairs) The master bedroom is up here, so far away from the girls' bedroom.
Wendy: Oh my. I think you will not live here for long. Maybe 6 months.

Scene 2
On the large rooftop terrace
Wendy: Right now, I clean your balcony every day. Will I need to clean this balcony every day?
Lynne: No, I don't think so. It is too large, and made of wood. We will wear sandals.
Wendy: I think that is best.
Lynne: (sees a large bug climbing a tree in the garden) Do you see that bug? What is that?
Wendy: That bug smells bad. If you touch it, your finger will smell bad for a long time.
Lynne: A stink bug?
Wendy: Yes, a stink bug.
Lynne: Yes, I think bugs will be a problem here. We will have to keep everything very clean so we don't have bugs and rats in the house. I really hate rats. I really don't want bugs or rats in the house.
Wendy: I think this is a very old tree. It is very large. Bugs will live in it. I think I can not clean this tree for you.

Scene 3
In the Living Room
Lynne: (to Wendy) I think they need to repaint the walls in here. Do you see the spots on the walls?
Wendy: Yes, I see the spots. I think they are not so bad.
Lynne: Hmm, I think that if we all see the spots then they are bad. There are many of them, and they are very large. It looks like they didn't finish painting this wall.
Wendy: Yes, I know. I think you should just hang pictures over all the spots. No problem.
Lynne: Oh, what if I don't want pictures in those places! Tony, we need to repaint this wall.
Tony: You think this is a problem?
Lynne: Yes, I think this is a problem.
Tony: I think it looks okay. Maybe they don't need to paint.
Lynne: If we all see the spots on the wall, then they are bad. I think they should paint one more coat of paint. It is a large wall. This is a simple job.
Tony: Alright, I will ask. (speaks in Mandarin to the contractor)
Contractor: (speaks in Mandarin to Tony - pointedly never speaks to me the entire day. In fact, generally begins speaking moments after I begin speaking.)
Tony: He says that they only painted the wall 1 month ago. He says it can not be dirty.
Lynne: I see. He is absolutely right. They did a lovely job painting the wall and keeping it clean. They just need to do a second coat.
(Tony and contractor speak in Mandarin again)
Tony: He says that if he paints the wall tomorrow, much paint will fall on the floor.
Lynne: I don't understand.
Tony: If he has to paint all of the walls in this room, that is a lot of paint. Much paint will fall on the floor and someone will have to clean it.
Lynne: I still don't understand. Why can the painter not clean it himself?
(Everyone looks at Lynne in surprise)
Tony: The painter does not do this. He paints. He does not clean.
(Lynne engages in conversation with Sophia, so as to extricate herself from the conversation)
Later
Lynne: (to Wendy) What did you decide about painting the walls?
Wendy: The painter will come tomorrow. I will follow behind him very closely, and quickly clean the floor whenever he paints.
Lynne: And you're okay with this?
Wendy: It is okay.
Lynne: I would suggest you bring along newspaper or an old cloth. Put it on the floor, and you will not have much to clean.
Wendy: Oh, that is a good idea!

H1N1

China has taken the H1N1 strain of the flu very seriously, which seems to have made international news a few times. They placed the mayor of New Orleans in week-long quarantine for a mild fever. They quarantined an entire hotel in Hong Kong for a week. And they claim to have negligible cases. The argument is whether the quarantine is truly working, or whether they've set such high standards that we've all been forced to lie. Arguments for both below:

Pro-Quarantine: No Swine Flu in China
We received communication from the girls' school this afternoon regarding the flu. We are under strict instructions to quarantine our children for 7 days if:
A: they show signs of the swine flu, as verified by a doctor
B: they return from visiting another country
C: 2 children in their class has the swine flu
The entire school will close for 2 weeks if they have to quarantine 2 of their classes.

This is serious business. These rules came straight from the Chinese government, and the school has no choice but to enforce them. Further rules have been enforced at hospitals and clinics for months. Before being allowed to enter a hospital or doctor's lobby, everyone must have their temperature taken. If anyone shows a fever, they may not be seen by the doctor. They are routed immediately to a public fever clinic, where they are to be screened for the swine flu and pumped with antibiotics.

Anti-Quarantine: Swine Flu Flying Under the Radar in China
Trouble is, we're all scared to death of those fever clinics. I include our doctors in the category of scared to death. One family doctor explained how to drop their body temperature in order to fool the front desk thermometer-ist. Ice water and air conditioning - lots of it. As this flu is not killing an inordinate number of people, it seems likely that folks with the flu are just staying home in China and quietly recuperating. That the swine flu has shown up, but continues to fly under the radar.

To their credit, I must admit that China has very few (possibly no) reported deaths from H1N1. Maybe its working. As an added bonus, preschoolers in Shanghai are much less likely to be spreading fevers around this year!

Baby's Last Night

This time last year, the night before Lilly began school at The Wonder Center, I wrote Baby's Last Night . Tomorrow I will leave Sophia in the morning and pick her up at the end of the school day. I face another baby's last night.

No backpack sits on the shelf. No lunch to be packed. At Tiny Tots, they distribute matching backpacks to every child and cook a hot lunch for the entire campus on a daily basis. No clothes sitting out, pretty dresses waiting to be pulled on for that 1st Day of School photo. The girls will wake together, pull the clothes right out of their closet and over their heads. Lilly begins at a new school, but she has already met her teacher and her classmates. She will stand confidently in that photo. But for Sophia, this will be the true 1st photo.

Tomorrow my baby goes to school.

This beautiful girl, my baby, has always been an individual.
She has rarely done anything at my suggestion, generally preferring complete failure to my assistance.
But anywhere she has ever gone, she has gone with me.
Anytime she has cried, she has come to me.
Anyone who has known Sophia has known her as an extension of me.

Tomorrow my baby goes to school.

And tonight is the end.

Tomorrow she becomes her own little person.
She’ll learn things that I don’t know.
She’ll say things I’ve never said.
She’ll know people I’ve never met.
She’ll go places I’ve never gone.
She begins her own life tomorrow.

My little girl, not even 3 years old, has grown so much. Its amazing to think about it. From the tiny baby, who doubled in size in just a few short months. The infant who screamed for hours on end, wearing my patience to the quick and introducing a young Lilly to sisterhood quite rudely. She could only be calmed with walking, carrying and walking. Nana had a perfect touch with her, soothing her quickly and for long spans of time. But at only 9 months, we tore her from family and neighbors to life in China.

She grew into a friendly toddler. A 1-year-old who loved the attention a fair Western child garners on a street in Shanghai. She kept her dramatic flair, but she developed spunk and an individuality which constantly surprises us. With a sibling only 15 months older, she fell easily into the role of kid sister. She played with older kids regularly, and began talking and learning their social rules with ease. She grew into a social confidence where people enjoy her company, but she shows a cool non-chalance about them. This always draws friends, and Sophia became a quick playmate.

When Lilly began school last year, Sophia loved the individual time with Mommy - a first in her life. But she also missed the constant companionship of her sister, and most enjoyed the time spent playing at Lilly's school every afternoon. She gave us no choice - Sophia wanted to start school this year.

I went along to the orientation week, where she met her teachers and walked through a shortened school day. Cool Miss Sophia rarely sent me a second glance. She smiled at her teachers, answered all questions posed to her with confidence, and declared that she likes none of the other children in her class. The youngest in her class of 3 year olds, and she's already the coolest kid there. She has such confidence, and is so ready for school that it seems ridiculous to feel sad. I am so proud of her. And still, so sad to say good-bye to my baby.

Housing and Moving

The paperwork is completed - at least on our side. We've finished our physicals, mailed in the bills, and submitted the names and addresses of every family member and foreign friend. These were each monumental tasks, but once completed they seem simple. And now we just sit and wait. We wait for Dave's Security Interview, where someone from the Embassy talks to him about what kind of security risk he may be. That's when they'll plan to talk to his employer. We wait for the staff nurses to review our medical forms, and come back to us with an All-Clear or a Few-More-Questions. We expect the All-Clear, as we all seem to be in perfect physical condition.

So now, we just wait. We don't bite our nails, as it seems the hard part is done. I'm quite confident that Dave will pass all of his clearances. So we just sit at home, wondering how long each step will take, and when we'll get the call telling us to move. And so, as we wait, we read and research and foresee and plan. I thought you might enjoy some of what we know.

Timing
We know that the clearance process has sped up considerably over the last few months, for people living stateside. We know that the process has probably also sped up for people abroad, but that it still takes quite a long time. Our best guess is that Security Clearance will take about 5 months, putting Dave on the register in February. We're betting that he'll be pulled off the register within a month, and have 1-2 months to move. That places us in the states around May, just in time for Dave's family reunion.

Moving
Thankfully, the State Department will pay to move us from here to the DC area. They will do this in 3 steps: 1 - plane tickets for the family; 2 - a sea shipment for household effects (HHE); 3 - an air shipment. The catch is that HHE goes straight into a storage facility in the DC area, ready to be shipped onto post as soon as we know when and where. The air shipment goes directly to our temporary home in DC. But restrictions on air shipment are vast, including a low weight limit and a restriction on furniture. Also thankfully, State will pack up a secondary location for us. So all of the items sitting in storage in St. Louis or taking up space in our family member's homes will move to DC on the government's dime. Prepare your homes, folks - we'll be taking back most of our things.

Housing
This is the part of most interest to me. State provides a per diem for housing while employees and their families live temporarily in the DC area. This per diem should cover decent housing in the area, and many landlords know how to work with the state per diem and charge accordingly. But the simplest option will be to move into Oakwood, a serviced apartment company which contracts directly with the State Department. They have a location near the training site which is dedicated almost exclusively to Foreign Service members. Its got a playground, a swimming pool, a good school district, a shuttle to the training site, and plenty of people in the same situation. They furnish each apartment and they provide the dishes and appliances that they know we'll need, as everyone there will have most of their possessions sitting in storage a few miles away.

As we've moved every year for the past few, I've come to the conclusion that temporary housing is no good. Wherever you live, that is your home. And especially as a mother, its my first job to make sure that a house feels like our home as quickly as possible. This housing situation will provide a real challenge, in deciding what to air ship and what to send to storage, how much to invest in such a short term house and wondering how long we will live there.

Initial training for Foreign Service Officers is an intense 5-week program, where everyone wears suits to class every day. The last week of training features Flag Day, where each graduating officer is handed the flag of their new post by way of announcing where they're going. Each trainee then moves on to language, which can be a few weeks or 10 more months, depending on the language and your level of skill.

It all gives us a lot to think about, a lot to get excited about, and only a little bit to worry about. For the most part, our decisions will be made for us and worry will not make things any better or worse.

The Perils of Motherhood, part II

I make no argument that raising children abroad is more difficult than raising them in one's home country. The actual parenting challenges may differ, but I imagine that many of the challenges I would face in the states come quite simply abroad and vice versa. Each individual child faces individual challenges, and those may be big or small for the child no matter where they live.

But being a mother abroad can be a very difficult task.

Finding the right milk is hard, and keeping cool under stress is hard, and not bad-mouthing the city and country which is their home is quite difficult. A parent's primary responsibility is to make choices for their child, healthy and balanced choices which lead to a healthy and balanced individual. And as an American, I like my choices. I like to enter Super Target and walk down the massive aisle filled with different kinds of toothpaste, because I know exactly which kind of toothpaste is best for me. But in China, I just don't have many choices. I can choose a local school, but this presents too many challenges for our temporarily Chinese family. I can choose an academically rigorous school, but my children are young. So I choose the one school that's left. Their preschool is fine - it offers a play-focused approach to learning, and allows preschoolers to attend half-day. We will all be home by 12:40 every day for an unstructured afternoon. But it has taken me most of this week to stop comparing it to The Wonder Center from last year, or to City Garden from St. Louis. And I still comfort myself with all of the options I know we'll have in DC.

As we've been here for 2 years now, I've pretty fairly accepted Shanghai as my home. I know what I can find, and what may not ever show up at the grocery store. I know not to hail a taxi in the rain and to avoid changing trains at the People's Square metro station. I know to seek out Western restaurants with a good reputation when I'm feeling grumpy, and to save the local places for when I'm feeling adventurous. I know how to ask for help, and how to ask for prayer. I know that I don't have many good choices available, and I've learned to be happy with what I have. I like my life.

I have two friends who have decided to move back home, because they just don't like it here. I can understand entirely, and I have certainly felt the urge. Especially in those first few months - rare is the individual who felt comfortable in Shanghai before hitting the 6 month mark. But mothering makes everything more difficult. Many young mothers reach Shanghai having only recently given up our career, and establishing themselves as non-professionals for the first time. Keeping a house running and children well-adjusted in this city is a full-time job that requires a staff, but its still a mental adjustment. Raising children far away from their family leaves us all guilt-ridden. We all work hard to keep our kids connected to their families in their home countries, while some of our families make very little effort. Unfortunately, my children can no longer name most of their aunts and uncles (although their grandparents and cousins are remarkably well burned into their minds). This is truly unfortunate, and it is due to a choice that Dave and I made. Health care is spotty, pollution is rampant, and food quality varies dramatically. Were I here without children, I would establish my identity based on my skills as a professional and my interests as a volunteer. Were I here without children, I would maintain ties with my family and easily re-establish key relationships in my few weeks back home. Were I here without children, I wouldn't worry about health issues, food safety or pollution would be minor blips on my radar.

Both friends will leave Shanghai with their children soon. Their husbands have chosen to stay here. This is not a choice toward divorce. This is two individuals needing to lead different lives for the next few years. A family deciding that the job is more important right now than being together all of the time. This is not as dramatic as it may sound. Many husbands in expatriate positions spend the majority of their time traveling, leaving their wife and children to navigate the challenges of Shanghai life on their own. The girls and I are blessed that Dave is usually around, and that he makes a concerted effort to be home for dinner most nights.

I am quite with the life that we've chosen, and excited to continue it for the foreseeable future. But with the changes forced upon us, and the friends giving up, it makes me see what a challenge motherhood adds to every choice I make. Anything with kids is amazing. But Shanghai without kids would be a breeze.

The Perils of Motherhood, part I

This is a hard job.

And so much harder with two kids inside the house, because you can't lie to one of them without them telling the other.
Lilly: I get the pink plate!
Fia: (crying) I wanted the pink plate!
Mommy: (to Fia, quietly) The blue plate is actually better, because it comes with a larger cupcake.
Fia: (to Lilly) You can have the pink plate. Its okay. The blue plate has a big cupcake.
Lilly: (now crying) I wanted the bigger cupcake!

School began this week for both girls. And both girls have such different personalities, such different reactions to change and to new people. Juggling their experiences this week confused me and became exhausting.

New people make Lilly nervous, and the prospect of so many changes at one time made her feel sick. She faced the new school with serious trepidation. We needed to choose our words very carefully this week, staying away from discussing the new house and her old school. But the easing-in process worked its magic for her, and by this morning she walked confidently into school and said good-bye to me with a smile on her face. And this afternoon she pointed out that many people move into new houses. Her friend Jill has a new house, and its really fun. Her old teacher has a new house, and it has a swimming pool. Discussing new houses and people from her last school of her own volition, and with a smile on her face was the sign I needed that she's okay with where her life is right now.

Fia, on the other hand. Well, Fia is a social animal. She has no need for other people, but people often want to be around her. She walks into a room, and she does what she wants. She has that confidence and too-cool-for-you attitude that makes people like her. She doesn't worry about much, this kid. And so I was proud, but not particularly surprised, at how smoothly her first two days went this week. Playing for a few hours with a bunch of new kids and a bunch of new toys, while mom hangs out in the corner? Fine with her. Then the poor kid pulled a fever of 103F and slept for two days in a row. On her return this morning, I expected the same cool attitude and was met with resistance. I'm just going to the fabric market for a little while, okay? I'll be back soon, I explained. Miss Lucy stood there, ready to guide her away to music class. But Fia's response? Tears filling her eyes, heels dug into the ground, Don't leave, Mommy. I wanna be with you. I can go to the fabric market. I really like the fabric market. I don't want to go to music. Tough kid that she is, tears never spilled from her eyes as I walked out. But sucker of a mom that I am, they certainly came to mine.

I returned after about one and a half hours, to find both kids smiling and fully immersed in their play. So much so that it took the promise of pizza with Daddy for lunch to get them out the door.

A Cool Kid

While Lilly sat at home, worrying herself sick over beginning her second year at a new school, Sophia went to orientation and essentially her first day of school. Although her sister did her best to instill fear in her, it never to Sophia to be nervous about it.

This is one cool kid.

No fear ever entered her heart, in the days or minutes leading up to beginning school.

I stayed with her during the 2 hour orientation, which was essentially a shortened school day. The kids cycled through the music room, the playground, the sand pit, and their classroom. Tiny Tots is certainly no Wonder Center, and Miss Lucy and no Mrs. Leary. But Sophia had no complaints. She cycled through with interest, she piped up loud and clear whenever the teacher asked a question, and she complained when told to stand in line for the 4th time that day.

When she got home, we asked about her day. A few specific questions, to dig some real info out of her.

Q: What's your teacher's name?
A: Lucy

Q: What's your favorite toy on the playground:
A: The swings

Q: What color did you paint with?
A: Red

Q: What was your favorite song?
A: The Wheels on the Bus

Q: Who was your favorite friend:
A: Nobody. I don't like any of them.

Confident that she is better than everyone else around her - I think she's angling for the coolest kid in the class.

Poor Little L--

Poor Little L-- is having a hard week.

This little girl, nearly 4 years old, have proven herself quite flexible and resilient in many ways. She travels well, easily handling new beds every night and happy to entertain herself on trains and airplanes. She doesn't need a routine, and can sleep in if she stays up late or skip a nap if she needs to. She gets excited about new playgrounds, new parks, new books and new libraries.

But new friends is another matter.

And Poor Little L-- is stuck in a particularly difficult week for a her who doesn't enjoy making new friends.

She had a wonderful year at school last year. She was a Wonder Center kid, and she loved it. She loved all of the teachers. She loved the other kids in her class. She had good friends there, who all left town the day after school finished. I promised her all summer that those friends would return in August, and that she could play with them until her new school starts. This made the new school much more palatable.

Her friends have all returned. But her friends all live a good drive away, and her friends are all struggling with jet lag. Her friends all begin school - at a different new school from her new school - tomorrow. L-- doesn't begin school until Thursday. Even worse, her sister begins at her new school tomorrow, too. So L-- faces a week without her good friends and without her sister.

This would be sad for L--, but nothing more. She enjoys playing at home, and she can entertain herself quite well. What makes this particularly bad is the anticipation.

We talked up her new school all summer. Every so often we'd mention how both of the girls get to go to a new school this fall. Tiny Tots sounds like a fun place, and we're sure that there'll be plenty of supernice teachers and loads of new friends to play with. Everyone was excited. S-- is still excited. That girl has nerves of steel. But as we reached the 1-week mark, L-- would say, I'm excited, and a little nervous. As we reached the 6-day mark, L-- would say, I'd reallly like to play with my Wonder Center friends. As we reached the 5-day mark, L-- began saying she feels sick, although no symptoms would manifest. Last night, she developed a high fever and had trouble sleeping. I fear this is going to get worse as we get closer, poor girl. Moving every 2-4 years may be a difficult life for this child.

Progress on Multiple Fronts

I wish I were such a person that after a day like today, I could sit on my breezy balcony with my computer on my lap and write an interesting story. Something with a good introduction, that ties into the conclusion. Something with good word choice, and a general arc to the story.

But I'm not. I've got so much whirling through my head right now that I'm dropping important things left and right. So, lets get right to brass tacks. Progress is happening in our household and its happening quite quickly.

Security Clearance
After a few back and forths with Kelly - a Human Resources gal for the State Department who we know much better than we would like - Dave has submitted his application for Security Clearance. He expects to hear from a local interviewer in about a month. At that time, he'll have to hand over basic information on all of his foreign friends. But otherwise, we've done the work for that piece. And now we sit and wait. Our best guess it that security clearance will take 6-9 months, putting Dave on the list in about March.

Medical Clearance
Dave and I saw the doctor this morning. He has seen plenty of government forms and took the entire bureaucratic nonsense in good, serious stride. As tremendously organized folks, we had our blood work, urinalysis, gynecologic and chest x-rays done last week. So the doctor had a full file before him when his little red hammer hit our knees. As it turns out, by the way, Dave has no reflexes at all, and my legs swing like a goats hind legs - POW! - when you hit them right.

He handed us photocopies of all of our lab work, and he filled out our forms to near completion. Results from the G6PD blood test have yet to return. This is a rare test for an enzyme disorder which causes patients to react to certain medications. Good to know, I suppose. We should receive those results tomorrow afternoon, check the little black box, and then send off for medical clearance for Dave and I. Dave's is the most important, as his MUST be received within 30 days of his offer letter (July 22). If not received, his candidacy is terminated. These government folks are serious. The girls and mine can be slower, although preferably not much.

The girls saw a pediatrician on Monday morning, and that was a barrel of monkeys for all of us. The doctor was quite good, and also familiar with American government's wily ways of tricking form-filler-outers into saying the wrong thing. As they needed less lab work, we did all of their fluids - as well as TB tests for the entire family - that morning. That means that our 2-year-old and our 3 (and a half)-year-old both peed in cups, had TB pumped under their skin through a needle, and donated two small vials of blood. L-- was none too pleased, and spent the better part of the morning in a state of panic. S-- could not have cared less, the worst of her complaining being Can I get down now? after they had worked for a few minutes to speed her slow-flowing blood.

They returned today to pick up the completed forms, and learn that no one has tuberculosis. Honestly, I'm not convinced that they checked the girls TB spots - I think they just looked at one of the many bug bites on their arms. But I'll take what I've got. As the nurse and I gave their forms one last look, I noticed that the doctor had missed their immunization records. She took them into his office, where he signed off for reviewing them and demanded that S-- have 2 more shots to make her up to date. So we ended our otherwise uneventful after at the doctor with two simultaneous shots into S--'s legs and suckers all around.

Because of the shot drama, I forgot to pick up photocopies of their lab work. But as the G6PD has yet to be received, I don't suppose I dropped the ball further than it can be easily retrieved.

Housing
We just completed negotiations on our new home. We gain access 2 weeks from tomorrow, losing access to this place 3 weeks from now. I'm beginning to feel a bit nostalgic about this place, and Dave and I both wish we didn't have to move. We have very good space, 4 playgrounds within our complex, our favorite local restaurant within walking distance, and this amazing breeze on our 10th floor balcony. All this will be hard to leave.

But the trade-offs are good. We will move into a lanehouse directly across the street from the girls' school. It could not possibly take us longer than 10 minutes to go door to door. The house was beautifully renovated, with color on the walls, wood details on the stairs, and amazing original windows in every room. The natural light is fantastic, and even includes a skylight bigger than I have ever seen situated right above the couch. The kitchen windows look out onto a small garden in the front, lined with trees and essentially private. The kitchen, dining room and living room are all open to each other - one of our favorite parts of the house. The rest of the rooms are pretty crummy - the girls room is bright and cheerful, but small. That's okay, as they'll play in the great room. The second bedroom downstairs is located right off of the kitchen, and must be a storage room. The kitchen has only a few cabinets not filled up with washing machines, dishwashers and water dispensers, and so we will keep many of our dishes, as well as our luggage, Christmas tree and books, in this storage room. Up the stairs to the master bedroom - very small, but filled with natural light. The only other thing on the 2nd floor is a wood deck, and what a wood deck it is. This deck is the largest room in the house. The railings are covered in flower boxes and half is fully shaded by a large tree. We expect to spend plenty of time up there - as soon as we invest in mosquito coils and citronella candles. I'm nervous about the lack of storage, about living on the 1st floor without any serious security system, about the bugs in an old house, and about sleeping an entire floor away from my children. But I'm excited about living somewhere so lovely, even if for only a few months.

and School
Amid all of this craziness, the girls begin school next week. Their school has a lovely orientation week, where the young kids (3 and under) begin in a Mommy-and-me style on Monday morning. She and I'll go to school from 9-11, meet the teachers and the other kids, and generally play for a few hours. We'll do the same on Tuesday morning, although maybe I'll run home for 30 minutes or so in the middle. This so she can adjust to having me leave her and return. Then Thursday, L-- gets to start too. Again, I'll stay all day. Then Friday, I should have an hour or so to myself. I'm doing my best to balance the fun of the last week of summer with the chaos of organizing a move and submitting all of this insane paperwork. The girls seem happy and excited about school, so at least I'm not doing anything to dissuade them.

Kinda Silly

Found in the hospital today:

The above sign says "Yurt / Not Exit."

I guess I assumed that Yurt translated to Not Exit in some language that I don't know.

So I peeked around the corner, and saw...


... a yurt, and not an exit.

As it was clearly labeled as "not an exit," I decided not to explore. I've got no further explanation for this find. But as far as I can recall, I have never come across a yurt in any hospitals in America.

Sunday at the Zoo

Two years in Shanghai, and only yesterday did we visit the zoo. Rumor had it that the zoo was a depressing relic from when zoos cared more about entertainment than about animal welfare. But friends and family had visited, expressing their pleasant surprise. Popular verdict on the Shanghai Zoo? Apparently, its not so bad.

We assume that these people all visited on a weekday. With people out en masse, all respect for the animals went out the window. The elephants stood in indoor cages only a few times larger than their own bodies, on poop covered floors. People threw candy and garbage at the monkeys, who skillfully caught and ate it all.

But the most egregious we saw was the giraffes. Check this out.
Q: Should these kids be allowed to feed the giraffes at the zoo?

A: Absolutely not. They and all of their neighbors jumped two fences to stand in such close proximity to these gentle giraffes.

Apparently, climbing into wild animal cages is child's play at this zoo.


Being careful not to be horribly negative, many animals did seem well cared for. The zebras had no one in their cages, and only seemed interested in eating the healthy food in their trough. The girls really enjoyed it. They especially loved the wide open spaces of the park. And they wish that they could enjoy all of the carnival games, ice-cream and electric toys being hawked along the paths throughout.

I'm no animal rights activist. My activism comes in other forms. But it made me feel ill to watch people so egregiously endangering these animals, and disobeying the stated rules.

But worse is that where the fault truly lays. Although these animals did not have stellar living conditions, the fact that they lived within the confines of a zoo did not anger me. That the zoo was not willing to protect their animals from ignorant or selfish people did anger me. Moreso because the worst problems would be eliminated by simply increasing staffing. Were a person in a little uniform standing near the giraffe's cage, they could sternly request that people not climb the fence. In a communist country where the government guarantees each of their 1.3 billion people a job; where they employ people to stand on corners with functioning traffic lights and direct pedestrian traffic; in a country where labor is always the cheapest factor; in a country pouring tremendous amounts of money into their economy. In such a place, this inattention is sinful.

Weekend in Chengdu - in photos

Thursday night
We spent the entire evening at the airport, due to typhoon-style winds and rains. We put our family up in the hotel airport, and took a flight out first thing Friday morning.

Friday
We spent the morning on the airplane, the afternoon napping, and the evening ducking under cover from the rain. Our first few days made us nervous about the rest of the weekend.

Saturday
It rained. Again. But we soldiered on. We hopped a taxi, and pushed through the driving rain to the Panda Preserve at the edge of town. As it turns out, pandas have no fear of rain. And once we got over our fear of the rain, we enjoyed their company. The highlight was the baby pandas - two weeks old, and smaller than my hand. These tiny things had peach fuzz, and bodies the color of their hair - a dark stripe across their arms and shoulders. No photographs aloud. But their big brothers or cousins were happy to pose.




Sunday
The rain cleared. The fog did not lift, but at least we could spend the day outside without making ourselves sick. We headed out of town in a rickety, surprisingly small little van with no seatbelts. Two hours later we stopped at a small mountain covered with shrines. Typically Chinese, it was covered with tourists in fancy dresses and high heels, and people selling packets of Oreos and boiled corn on the cob. Still, lovely - and the higher we hiked, the less crowded it became.

We cheated a bit on the hike - and enjoyed a cable car ride partway up and down.

The fog clouded the view tremendously... and it was still lovely.


Monday
As our flight didn't leave until 8pm, we took it easy all day. We walked around town a bit, finding traditional architecture showing how connected Chengdu seems to its Chinese roots. Shanghai only shows this type of detail in fancy restaurants exclusively for tourists. But we found moon gates and pagodas around every corner in this town.


Oh, and easy access to the construction of the town's metro. Look at that hole!







The park full of moongates, pagodas and bridges also had a children's playground full of carnival rides. And the girls loved it! Check out the blurry look of torment and joy on this faces!

Lunch at a ma po do fu restaurant. Their spicy tofu was tasty - and tasted nothing like Wendy's. Much more oil, full of Sichuan peppercorns, and neglegible pork.


But here's the best part. On the flight home, a crew of 40 or so elementary school kids boarded the plane behind us in matching bright orange t-shirts. And check out where they seated the 8 year olds - in all of the emergency exit rows. Gotta love China - where they leave 9 out of 10 doors locked at the mall, and where they seat children in the emergency exits. At least these little guys had plenty of leg room!

Weekend in Chengdu - in words

With the prospect of a lifetime in the foreign service, Dave and I now approach towns with a fun question. Should we live here someday? Asking the question in Shanghai, the answer is quite simple. No. Although I enjoy my life in Shanghai, I’ve got no love for the city. I have enjoyed other spots in China, but never wanted to live there. The distance from Western community and conveniences would be too great to live in China’s great areas of beauty.

But when we hit Chengdu - home to one of America’s consulates - we stopped to think. I find it difficult to put into words what I like about Chengdu. The capital of Sichuan province, it is a surprisingly small city. With a population of around 4 million people and a span that may be driven across in an hour, Chengdu is a far cry from Shanghai. But its not just the size and relative accessibility of the city that draw me to it. The city feels comfortable to me. It is modern, without being flashy. The city has some money, but seems comfortable with its money. The homes look small and simple, but also clean and comfortable. The sidewalks are wide, and the streets are not crowded.

The city also seems comfortable in its Chinese and Sichuanese identity. The scent of Sichuan spices fill most streets, making walks mouthwatering and meals delicious. The architecture preserves old buildings with taste, and fills them with tea houses and noodle shops rather than German beer halls. And a simple drive out of town brings you into the heart of subtropical, rural Sichuan. Our drive outside of town on Sunday reminded me of the American South. We passed plenty of shacks, plenty of people walking along gravel roads and footworn paths. But we also passed plenty of new cars - simple, and not flashy. And plenty of modern homes - simple, but solid. And vines, trees and leaves covered everything not recently touched, adding an air of mystique and life to even the fallen fences and ramshackle homes.

I’ve often found myself enjoying the smaller cities in developing countries. The largest cities often seem so soulless - so willing to shed their culture and their history to become a quick copy of the West. Smaller cities retain their charm and their identity. Who knows if we could or will live in Chengdu. But I’m certainly not averse to it.

post-script: apparently, I am fiercely allergic to something in the air in Chengdu. By the time we returned home, I had a strong sore throat and my nose has been running below the sinus pressure in my head for days now. The longer I'm back in Shanghai, the more it clears out. So maybe Chengdu's not on the list after all!

Progress Made

A busy day in the changing life of our family. Today we worked toward two major goals - medical clearance from America, and finding a new home.

Medical Clearance

We fasted from 10pm last night - of course, last night was the evening I couldn't sleep. And boy, was I hungry at 1:15 this morning! We reached the doctor's office first thing this morning, and we had the first appointment with a nurse. We moved in swiftly, and saw the same nurse who ordered our labs for me the week before. Dave and I sat right down and began a battery of tests - 6 vials of blood for each of us, 2 cups of pee in total, and then a walk into the local hospital for our chest X-rays.

Word on the street is that the doctors in local hospitals are quite well qualified, and that the medical care they provide in Shanghai is top-notch. The rumor surrounding expatriate doctors is that, well, there must be some reason they're practicing in China. Maybe their malpractice rates got too high? Maybe they graduated last in their class? Still, a walk into one of the VIP clinics we are privileged to use makes me much more comfortable than the time we spent in the local hospital this morning.

Although I have faith that the chest X-ray was done well, I have very little faith in the overall health of the hospital. A man - an orderly or lab technician, by his blue outfit - stood smoking a cigarette in the hallway where we waited. Even better - two elderly patients in hospital smocks waited there as well, and someone with a blanket and a gurney was wheeled past his smoke. Even better than that - he stood right next to the No Smoking sign. Clearly no one cared. The floors and walls were filthy. The poor man on the gurney was rammed into every corner he passed - and those corners showed evidence of plenty of previous rammings. Someone had spilled something on the floor in the X-ray room, but not bothered to clean it up. Doors were all open - offering no privacy and easy cross-contamination. I saw nothing sterilized, including hands.

With our bodily fluids left behind, we walked out of the building and washed our hands with plenty of soap. We still need to find someone willing to give us TB tests by Wednesday morning, and must confirm that the doctor will see us at our appointed time. If all of that occurs, he and I should be in business. I have had no opportunity to pre-order labs for the girls, so I am still a bit worried about their paperwork.

The Move

We have an offer in hand. A high-rise apartment building, 20 minute walk from the school, fully furnished and quite sterily decorated is available to us at a good price. The management seems good, the place seems boring but easy, and the distance is at the far-end of walkable.

But just to keep things interesting, I looked at a lanehouse this morning. Shanghai's old houses do not face the street, but rather line small alleys which run off of the streets. These alleys are called lanes, and the old houses are called lanehouses. They have plenty of character and often local neigbors. This house fit the bill perfectly - it is beautifully rehabbed with original lead windows and lovely woodwork, but also an open and modern kitchen, a small garden lined with trees, and a tremendous rooftop terrace. The layout and the furniture are a bit weird, but all things we're willing to live with for the layout and the access to the outdoors. What's better - it is nearly across the street from the school. No more than a 5 minute walk. We're in the process of negotiating for this house, but fully realize that the price may not drop to a reasonable level.

Besides which, I made it to the grocery store and the pharmacy, updated my phone and visited the tailor for my new dress (we're still working on it - Chinese tailors don't seem to know what to do about breasts!)

Awfully nice to make such progress in one morning!

Chili Sauce

Wendy, our ayi, makes our lives in Shanghai quite comfortable. She does our laundry and washes our dishes. She babysits every Saturday evening. She cooks lunch for us every day. She keeps our home nice and clean, and stays with the girls whenever I need her help. Life with a housekeeper is good - especially life with a housekeeper as good as Wendy.

However, she's made no promise that she will come to our new home. Already she travels nearly 1 hour every morning on the bus to reach our house. She will not make her commute any longer.

With the prospect of potentially losing Wendy, I've asked her to teach me how to cook some of our favorite dishes. My favorite lunch is ma na do fu (spicy tofu), and Dave's favorite dinner is gong bao ji ding (kung pao chicken). Both dishes are made differently every time you eat them, and quite differently in China than in America. Both dishes are Sichuan dishes, and originally made spicy by Sichuan peppercornws - which have a numbing effect and were illegal in the US until 2005. As I learned, when Wendy makes them the two dishes are quite similar - and the key ingredient is Chinese chili sauce, available in an Asian grocery aisle. Still, they're super tasty and we plan to keep them as staples in our home for as long as we can. For your enjoyment,

ma na do fu - spicy tofu
Bring to a boil in the wok:
water

Marinate together:
1/2 lb. minced pork
1-2 t. Chinese cooking wine

Boil for 2-4 minutes:
1 brick of soft tofu, cut into cubes

Turn off heat under wok.
Remove tofu with a slotted spoon.
Rinse the wok - heat to dry.

Add to hot wok:
2-3 T. oil

Cook until fragrant:
3 cloves chopped garlic
2 t. fresh grated ginger
4 chopped green onions - bottoms only

Add:
marinated pork

Cook until just brown
Add:
1 bowl of water

Add seasonings to taste:
4 t. chili sauce
2 t. lite soy sauce (for color)
2-4 t. dark soy sauce (for flavor)
pinch of chicken bouillion granules
3 t. vinegar
2 t. sugar

Add:
cooked tofu

Remove a bit of broth. Add:
bit of starch

Stir until thick and return to the mix.

Serve hot with
sticky rice.
Garnish with :
green onions - tops

gong bao ji ding - kung pao chicken
Mix to marinate:
3 chicken breasts, cubed
1 t. Chinese cooking wine
1 heaping t. starch

Add to hot work:
1 T. oil

Add to hot oil:
1 C. plain peanuts

Stir frequently, until nuts begin to darken and become fragrant.
Place on paper towel to cool and soak oil.

Add to hot work:
2 T. oil

Cook until no longer pink:
marinated chicken

Remove chicken from the wok.

Cook until fragrant:
chopped ginger
3-4 chopped green onions - bottoms
4 cloves chopped garlic

Add:
1-2 C. water

Bring to a boil.
Add seasonings to taste:
3 T. chili sauce
1 t. dark soy sauce (for color)
1 t. lite soy sauce (for flavor)
1 t. sugar
1 t. chicken bouillion granules

Add:
cooked chicken.

Serve hot with sticky rice.
Garnish with green onions - tops.

The Value of My Time

Yesterday, I spent just over an hour arguing with customer service reps to decrease an exorbitant medical bill from a routine doctor visit. I left having saved myself an extra $30. So it seems my time is worth under $30 an hour.

This afternoon, we asked a cab to drive us to the hotel in the pouring rain. He offered to for 50 RMB. Knowing that $8 was ridiculous for such a short ride, we chose to walk with luggage and sleepy children through the rain for just under an hour. So we have established my time is worth less than $8 an hour.

But I have a project at home which could save me $150. I asked my mom to pick up a prescription for me before her last visit. When I told her it may be expensive, I expected a bill of around $30. When she received the $200 receipt, she didn’t flinch. Well, she probably thought me a bit frivolous. But she paid - I had told her it would be expensive. The pharmacy did not have my current insurance card, and so provided the prescription without any coverage - hence the high bill. And although I will spend an hour arguing down my current bill by $30, I have yet to find the time to attempt the fix on this one. Perhaps because even at $6 an hour - which seems to be my established rate - I don’t think a fight with the prescription insurance people would end up being worth my time.

Disappointing, to say the least

Call me a lazy writer, but this shocking story from the China Daily speaks for itself.

Abortion Statistics Cause for Concern
By Shan Juan in Beijing and Qian Yanfeng in Shanghai (China Daily)
Updated: 2009-07-30 06:45

Inadequate knowledge about contraception is a major factor in the 13 million abortions performed in China every year, research shows.

Abortion statistics cause for concern

This is an unfortunate - and avoidable - situation, experts said, and improvements need to be made.

Li Ying, a professor at Peking University, said Wednesday that young people need more knowledge about sex.

A survey done by 411 Hospital of PLA (People's Liberation Army) in Shanghai, for example, found that less than 30 percent of callers to a hotline knew how to avoid pregnancy, and only 17 percent were aware of venereal diseases.

More than 70 percent said they did not know sexual transmission is the major contributor to the spread of HIV/AIDS.

Li said Chinese parents are reluctant to teach their children about sex, so more needs to be done on sex education.

"Sex education needs to be strengthened, with universities and our society giving more guidance," she said.

Wu Shangchun, a division director of the National Population and Family Planning Commission's technology research center, told China Daily that research shows nearly half of the women who had abortions had not used any form of contraception.

"The challenge of reducing (the number) of women seeking abortions in China is tough," Wu said.

Yu Dongyan, a hospital gynecologist, said new mores have changed the social setting.

"Sex is no longer considered taboo among young people today, and they believe they can learn everything they need from the Internet. But it doesn't mean they've developed a proper understanding or attitude toward it," Yu said.

Government statistics show that about 62 percent of the women who have abortions are between 20 and 29 years old, and most are single.

Wu said the real number of abortions is much higher than reported, because the figures are collected only from registered medical institutions.

Many abortions, Wu said, are performed in unregistered clinics.

Also, about 10 million abortion-inducing pills, used in hospitals for early-stage abortions, are sold every year in the country, she said.

The Shanghai hotline, which offers help for pregnant women, has reported an increase in calls, mostly from women 18 and under.

Figures from 411 Hospital show that as many as 30 calls were received on its hotline some days this month, compared with about 10 per day in previous months.

Most callers had questions about what to do after becoming pregnant or how to get an abortion, said Yu.

Wu said birth control information mainly reaches young married couples.

The morning-after pill, which can be used within 120 hours of intercourse to prevent pregnancy, has been widely sold as emergency contraception since 1998, she said.

Wu said the pills have sold well, but she added that incorrect use is a problem.

Wu also said much information on the Internet about sex frequently is incorrect.

Sun Xiaohong, of the educational center of Shanghai's Population and Family Planning Commission, said she found it difficult to promote sex education in schools because some teachers and parents believe it will encourage sex.

Sun Aijun, a leading gynecologist at Beijing Union Hospital, said there also is a misconception among some women that the contraceptive pill is unsafe.

Sun said many unmarried couples choose to use condoms, but that this can be problematic because some women find it difficult to turn down requests from a partner not to use them.

Abortions cost about 600 yuan ($88). Since the 1990s, doctors have not asked for a woman's marital status when an abortion is performed.

There are about 20 million births in the country each year, Wu said.

Foiled

It seems that our landlord wasn’t interested in our non-moving plans. He plans to sell the apartment, and wants us out. Poor little S-- will not have lived anywhere for longer than 12 months until she is over 5 years old, at the rate we’re going.

Full Disclosure

I am excited to admit that I’ve been lying to you.

We have no friend named Doug.

Well, actually, we do have a friend named Doug. A very nice fellow with a little baby girl. But our friend Doug has not applied to the US Foreign Service. No, in an effort to keep the job search secret from Uncle H--, Dave assumed a secret identity on this public forum.

Our very own Dave began his application to the Foreign Service last December. And a week ago he passed his Oral Examination, making him a potential candidate with a conditional offer of employment.

This means that although the State Department has decided he is qualified and desirable for the position, he must jump through a number of hoops.

Hoop #1: Medical Clearance
Every member of our family must be given a clean bill of health. Each member of the foreign service must be able to serve in any of the embassies or consulates the U.S. maintains worldwide. Many, if not most, of these are away from quality medical care. I’m not sure how they make this an Equal Opportunity position, but a member of the Foreign Service must have a clean bill of health in order to serve. Their family need not pass with a clean bill of health - but if we prove unhealthy, we will likely spend many years living in different parts of the globe. The government reserves the right to assign employees to stations without their family.

We have already begun the process on our medical clearance. I’ve had a gynecological exam and scheduled the labs for Dave and I to begin on Wednesday. The challenge for us is thus: he must submit completed paperwork within 30 days of acceptance. That is by August 22nd. But all quality doctors leave Shanghai for the summer (also for any major holidays - avoid hospitals during Chinese New Year). So we have scheduled our physicals for August 15. This only leaves 1 week for any questionable results, mistakes on the report or other unexpected problems. Still, we expect to clear this hoop by the end of the month.

Hoop #2: Security Clearance
Dave will need Top Secret Security Clearance by the US government. They will talk to authorities everywhere we have lived for the past 10 years. They promise to track down every family member, and at least one American friend able to vouch for our every address. They will run background checks on every foreign friend. For many people, this process can take a few months. For folks living abroad and maintaining plenty of foreign contacts, this process could take closer to 7 months.

Hoop #3: The List
After being cleared medically and securely, Dave will be placed on the list. This list runs in rank order. At the end of his interview, they gave him a number and a track. The track is Political and the number is in the upper third, with 7 as the highest. As the foreign service needs people in the political field, they draw the highest ranked folks out of the pool. If someone interviews after Dave and ranks higher, that person will be drawn first. Being drawn up from the list could be immediate, and could take a few months. People do languish on the list for 18 months without being offered a job, eventually being dropped again. But in the current climate, someone in the upper third is unlikely to languish long.

Hoop #4: Get the heck outta Dodge
Once the offer comes, we have 1-2 months to move to Washington, DC. Thankfully, the government pays relocation costs including shipment of household goods - which saves us a boatload of money. While in DC on a short-term assignment, they also pay for housing. They post salary guidelines quite clearly. And so we now have a pretty good idea what our life will look like within a year.

I find it wonderfully refreshing to have so many answers. I do not know how long we will wait for the offer, but I know the look of the rest of my year. We plan to stay in our apartment (no more moves within Shanghai) and the girls both plan to begin preschool at a new school near our home. Once we move, we expect to live in a contracted apartment complex in Falls Church, where L-- qualifies for public school kindergarten in the fall. Good friends from Shanghai recently moved to Falls Church and promise to help us get settled, find a good school for S-- and welcome us into their church.

A few major questions still remain.

Timing is the first - we could move in as little as 2-3 months and as long as 12-18 months. We expect Uncle H-- to end our contract at the end of next summer. What happens if we finish here before they’re ready for us? Honestly, I don’t expect that to happen. I’m figuring we’ll move in late winter or early spring of 2010.

The adoption is the second. We can leave China with no consequences. But when we move, we have to update our entire file. And after 1 year, we have to update our entire file. It is possible we will have to update our entire file - lengthy paperwork and costly bills - twice within a few months of each other if the move comes at the wrong time. Unfortunately, this problem does seem a likely scenario.

Uncle H-- is the third. The government will contact Dave’s employer during the security clearance. It seems likely that at least a few decision makers will know about his planned departure. We have no idea what this will mean. As the position has a clear endpoint (next summer), we expect he would not get fired. But makes the first question that much stronger.

Health Insurance is the last. Government insurance begins sometime during training - and is not retroactive. Our family will go from Dave’s last day in his current position to sometime in the middle of training - possibly up to 5 weeks - without health insurance. I had an IUD removed this week, and you may take that as an expression of intent. The wrong weeks without insurance could be amazingly expensive.

I’ve got loads of details which I find amazingly interesting, but the stuff of government documents and employment manuals may not interest each of you as much as it does Dave and I these days. So I’ll leave it at this.

One request. As mentioned above, Uncle H-- does not know. And most people at Uncle H-- will not know until the last minute. Please keep the secret. We kept this story from the blog for the past 8 months in the interest of secret keeping. After much discussion, we’ve deemed it wildly unlikely that any of his coworkers read this blog. And highly therapeutic to be able to share this story and chronicle this journey. Still, if given the opportunity to spill the beans, please refrain.