Thursday, August 01, 2013

Home

When we talk about home with our kids, we teach them how lucky they are to have multiples.  We teach them that home is wherever we all live together, and is not defined by a space.  Right now, our home is in Caracas - but it won't always be.  But we also teach them that they have loads of homes.  They felt at home in Arlington, and so Northern Virginia is absolutely one of their homes.  They feel at home in Nana and Poppa's house, and in Grammy and Grampa's house.  They feel connected to St. Louis, but the two oldest were born there.  Annika feels connected to China for the same reason.  This is a blessing, we teach them.  And we believe its true.

We just returned to Caracas after 6 weeks in the states.  And in our sixth week, Lilly did not feel the blessing of multiples homes.  She felt at home in Nana and Poppa's house.  And that made Caracas feel far away and foreign - certainly not like home.  I agree with her.  Our home in Caracas is nothing like Nana and Poppa's house.  It is modern and airy and simply decorated.  It has neutral colors and walls of windows.  Nana's house has a different color in every room and beautiful old woodwork and loads of plants and the detritus that gathers when you live in a house for a long time.  Nana's house is cozy and comfortable.

Moving in the middle of the year was hard, and I don't think Lilly felt like she fit into her class until the last few weeks of school.  By the time she had spent the summer surrounded by family and old friends, America felt much more like home to her than her memories of Caracas.  She did not want to come back.

This afternoon, after a few days back in Caracas we went to a birthday party at the park.  And good news - Lilly fit in.  She played with old friends and she played with a new friend.  She liked them all and she felt comfortable in the crowd.  I had the same feeling.  I enjoyed catching up with friends, and the casual comfort of being with the people who you see every day, with whom you share the little frustrations and the little joys of life.  We don't have old friends here, but we do have good friends.

I wouldn't want to live in Caracas forever, but I feel fully at home here right now and I'm happy to be looking toward a full year in this place.

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